Page 53 of Work It Out
Her lips said, “No.” But she wouldn’t meet his eyes.
His laugh mocked them both. “You know what, cupcake? I’m not a big fan of pity cuddles, either.” Hands on his knees, he stood slowly, because he’d be damned if he’d risk her having to save him again.
Slender fingers wrapped around his forearm. “Pity cuddles? You think this is about pity?”
“I have it on good authority that no one wants a man who swoons all the time.”
Rayah bounded to her feet and squared off with him. “I’m not Yvonne. I don’t think less of you because of your medical condition, dumbass. I think less of you for lying to me and being an irresponsible idiot with your health and your safety, but this isn’t about your POTS, at least not the way you mean.”
“Sure,” he murmured. Did anything feel worse than watching history repeating itself? “Listen, I’ll be out of your hair tonight. Don’t worry, I’ll take Vicky with me.” He strode toward the stairs.
“I don’t know if I can do it.”
Jake stopped, but kept his eyes on the mountains.
“I don’t know if anything I do can make this happen for you, and it kills me.” The ache in her voice gutted him. She didn’t sound like his warrior goddess now. “What you’re asking of your body is next to impossible for anyone. Building the kind of muscle you want takes time you don’t have. And you wasted a week with a stupid lie.
“Your body is pushing back harder than anything I’ve seen, and it may get worse before it gets better—ifit gets better. I don’t know enough about your condition yet, and I’m worried you don’t, either. If you want any chance at all, you can’t afford for either of us to split our focus. Honestly, neither can I.
“Your fees will go a long way to keeping this place operating, but I’m sure a premium hike is in my future. After Christmas you’ll be gone. The bills won’t be. I need to plan further out. I need to go on as if the publicity of your work here does nothing for my bottom line. I need a way to make this place profitable long-term. So many people—all of whom I care about a lot—are depending on me. I can’t let any of you down over something that’s less than a week old and already doomed.”
He turned back to her then. She’d said it all with admirable conviction, but the fading sun caught the moisture in her eyes. His heart ached, and yet he was furious. He’d had the same thoughts and more. It was too fast. He’d leave and she’d stay. Hearing her use those things as an excuse to push him away, however, made them feel like just that, excuses.
“I know you’re under a lot of pressure.” Jake eased toward her again. “But I promise, I will promote the shit out of this place when I’m done.”
“And why should I believe you?” Her gaze flitted away like a startled bird and her voice was barely a whisper when she added, “I trusted you. You have no idea how hard that was for me.”
“Yes, I do.” Wanting her to see the truth in his eyes, he tipped her chin up with one finger. “Because the ability to trust is one more way you’ve proven to be so much stronger than me. And as little as my word is worth to you, I will find a way to promote Explosion.”
“Then I guess it’s extra important that nothing impedes your progress.” The wobble in her lips tugged at her cheek, forcing a tear from her eye. “Even me.”
“What if I want it all?” He closed the last of the distance between them, wrapped one arm around her waist, and brushed the wet trail from her face with his thumb. “What if I want the career and the girl?”
“Having it all is a fool’s myth.” Her voice shook. “Something always has to give.”
“And that something has to be us?” He hugged her close. She turned her head and pressed her ear against the center of his chest, as if she were memorizing his heartbeat.
“Part of me doesn’t want it to be. You have no idea how rare that is for me, but…” Finally, her head drifted back enough for her to look up at him. The answer was there in the tears now streaming down her cheeks. “There’s too much at stake. For both of us. And Vicky,” she swallowed, “Vicky’s going to need you. And honestly, I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to trust you that much again.”
“Damn it. Rayah, I swear—”
She didn’t let him make any more promises. She looped her arms around his neck and lifted herself against him. He pulled her higher, tight against his chest, because she could never truly be close enough. When her lips found his, her weight against his sternum seemed to be the only thing keeping his rib cage from cracking wide open. The kiss was achingly sweet, filled with a different kind of passion. More than a kiss, this was her goodbye to all they might’ve been.
Too soon she eased her mouth from his and framed his face in her hands. “These dimples…” She pressed a kiss to one divot. Her whisper feathered across his skin. “I want the world for you, Jake. I really do.”
“I want the world for you, too.”
Her lips curled against his cheek. “I know.”
With that, she kissed him one last time, slid gracefully to her feet, collected her shoes and mug, then strode inside. She didn’t look back. Thank God, she didn’t look back. He might not have been able to let her go.
Chapter Eighteen
October 25
Healthybeat.com
Top 10 Benefits of Compression Wear During Exercise
