Page 89 of Cuts like a Knife
“Oh, in the usual way,” says Maylee. “Danny and I locked eyes in a romantic dive-bar.”
“Yup, and I was wasted, but not wasted enough to miss the fact that I’d just caught sight of an angel283.”
“He was very persistent,” she admits. “It’s a boring story. Sorry.”
“You were a fan?” I ask Danny and the three of them — Maylee, Danny, even John Paul— all look at each other and start laughing.
“I had no idea who she was,” Danny admits.
“Right, because I’m nobody,” says Maylee.
“But I recognized her,” said John Paul. “Because your boy is cultured. I have seen some things.”
“Like me in a kid’s movie? I’m not sure that equals high culture,” interjects Maylee.
“Hush woman,” he says. “So to continue, I was like, brother, you better sober up and talk nice to that girl because I think she likes you, but this window is closing fast. We didn’t have any souse on hand, though.” They all laugh.
“You were there too?”
“Oh yeah. These boys were joined at the hip. I was the third wheel, believe it or not,” Maylee says.
“I’m not sure I believe it,” interjects Drew.
“You shouldn’t,” says John Paul. “They’re full of it. The two of them locked eyes and that was is. The rest of the world was gone, man. Don’t let them tell you different. They’re making it up.”
“What can I say? I’m a sucker for a man with tattoos,” laughs Maylee.
“Plus, you abandoned me to come down here to paradise to open a food shack, so who abandoned who? Whom?” Danny is gesturing at his friend with a piece of meat on the end of his plastic fork. He pops it into his mouth with a so there sort of expression, and John Paul merely shakes his head.
“You went first, brother. Leaving me for a woman — sorry, May. The heartache! I had to come down here to cheer myself up. The islands are a balm for the soul. Plus you landed on TV, Mr. Big Time. What are you complaining about?”
The three of them laugh again, and Drew looks nonplussed. I probably do too.
Catching his expression, Danny explains. “I was on a Canadian cooking show for awhile, eh, but it’s so not big time. You can be on TV in Canada and even technically be famous, but you’re still a regular person. You know what I’m saying?”
“Me personally?” Says Drew. “I definitely can’t say that I do know, but I appreciate the education!”
“I thought you were in New York?” I say to Maylee284, but she doesn’t seem to hear me285. I try a different tack. “What about you two?” I indicate the guys, trying to keep my tone light, and only idly interested286.“When did the bromance begin?”
“Oh, I’d say first year,” says Danny.
“Nah, I hated your tattooed a— in first year.”
“We fell in love on the waterpolo court287,” adds Danny.
“Which was second year,” corrects JP.
“So you were … at school together?” I ask.
“University, yeah,” says Danny, finishing his souse, and lifting the bowl to his mouth to slurp up the final dregs.
“McGill. It’s in Canada,” adds JP, probably noticing the look on my face.
“Americans don’t know s— about our universities. If it’s not Big Ten or Ivy League, or if it hasn’t been mentioned on some god-forsaken TV show, it might as well not exist,” says Danny. “Even Oxford and Cambridge don’t sound as good to you guys as Haaarrrvaaard,” he adds, putting on a ridiculous Bostonian accent. “Isn’t that right?”
“I admit it,” laughs Drew. “We’re pretty bad about everything outside of our borders. Culturally, we have a bit of a silo mentality288, I guess.”
“But you’re a chef,” I say, struggling to get a handle on my confusion, which is growing by the second. “You don’t really need college for that, right? Why go at all?”
