Page 34 of Star Bringer
The rest of the doors lead to more cabins and another bathroom. “Looks like there are three cabins,” Ian says. “Some of us will be sharing.”
I push past him to get a look at the room myself. It’s quite small, and there are three narrow beds, one along each wall. All are bare of bedding, but at least it’s warm on the ship and we won’t freeze when we try to sleep.
And just that easily, a wave of exhaustion washes over me. It’s been a long day. But it’s not time to sleep yet. We still have decisions to make.
“So, who will you be sharing with, Princess?” His voice is teasing, but the look on his face is anything but. It makes me uncomfortable, but in a good way, if that makes sense.
“I—I can’t share. I need a room to myself.”
“I don’t think that’s going to happen.” He studies me like I’m some sort of interesting specimen. “Are you always this selfish? Is that just part of being who you are?”
I start to tell him that it’s not selfishness, that I need a room to myself because a princess can’t be seen in moments of weakness or vulnerability. I can’t change clothes in front of anyone but my companion-in-waiting. Grief threatens to swamp me again at the thought of Lara, but I beat it back down. I certainly can’t cry in front of someone.
And I can’t sleep in front of anyone, either. What if one of my dreams—or worse, my nightmares—has me crying out?
I can’t tell him that, though. Just wanting that privacy makes me sound weak or needy, neither of which is acceptable.
When I remain silent, just staring at him with what I’m sure are confused eyes, Ian shakes his head in annoyance. “Whatever you’re used to back home, on this ship you’re just another person, like anyone else—except, I suspect, a little more useless.”
The words are more painful than they have any right to be. I want to argue, to say I’ll do what it takes to pull my weight on this ship, but he barrels on and doesn’t give me a chance.
“You can share with Max and Gage. Max would never do anything to hurt you. And Gage—” He shakes his head in obvious annoyance. “Gage may be an untrustworthy fuck, but you won’t have to worry about him crawling into bed with you in the middle of the night. You’re not his type.”
“I never presumed I was. But how do you know that?”
“Gage is into guys, and you are most definitely not a guy.” He shrugs. “But, hey. If you want to room with Beckett instead—”
“Max and Gage will be fine,” I tell him hastily. Because I definitely don’t trust her not to hurt me the second I close my eyes.
“That’s what I thought,” he smirks. “But I’ll warn you—Max snores.”
I couldn’t care less about Max snoring, but I file away the information that Ian doesn’t trust Gage, despite the fact that he obviously hired him for something back on theCaelestis. Maybe if he’s for hire, I could persuade him to help me get home—in exchange for a hefty reward, of course.
I glance up at Ian, who has a small smile on his face as if he knows exactly what I’m thinking. Abruptly, I realize how close he is—way less than a meter away. His dark eyes are gleaming in the dim half-light, and I’m suddenly a little lightheaded.
“What about you?” I ask, and my voice is slightly hoarse—probably from all the smoke I inhaled earlier. Still, there’s something inside me urging me to take a risk for once, to be just a bit reckless. I listen to it, even though I know I shouldn’t, and ask, “How do you like your guys?”
“I don’t, normally.” He takes a step closer, and my breath catches in my dry throat. “Do you really want to know what I like, Princess?”
I swallow and shake my head, adding a little disdainful sniff for good measure. “Why would I?”
He ignores the comment. “Right now, I seem to like stuck-up princesses who think they’re better than everyone else. I have an overwhelming urge to find out just what makes you so special.”
I consider backing away, but I’ve done that more than I ought to in the past day. So I stand my ground and square my shoulders even as I try to ignore the warmth that’s settling low in my belly. “Then why don’t you come over here and find out?”
He moves toward me a little bit at a time. “Here I come, Princess. Better brace yourself.” He’s leaning in slowly. Steadily. Closer and closer until the very air between us is filled with the warm coffee-and-leather scent of him.
It’s a good scent—an arousing one—and I find myself drawing it deep inside my lungs as I wait and wait and wait.
“It doesn’t matter one bit to me what you do.” I try for a superior air, but did my voice just tremble?
Honestly, in this moment, I don’t give a shit, because Ian is right here, big and strong and so, so dangerous, and all I can think about is the way he’s looking at me. And the way I am the worst of liars, because nothing has mattered more than what he plans to do next—
There’s a sudden thump behind us, like someone’s just dropped something or run into a wall.
I jump back, heart in my throat. Then stare up at Ian, wide- and wild-eyed as I realize what just almost happened here. And that someone else on board saw the whole thing.
Chapter 13
