Page 47 of Hateful
He gives me a little sideways smile, which I return as I feel a blush creep to my cheeks. When I glance back over at Jasper and Rafael, Rafael’s eyes are fixed on me. He’s giving me that annoyingly smug look he wears when he knows he’s right.
“Go ahead and start packing,” the professor calls from the front of the room, surprising me since I’d thought the class was far from over. Here with Heath, the hour and a half of class time passed it what felt like mere minutes. “We’ll continue this lab next time. Makesureyou put everything away correctly,” he stresses as a loud flurry of activity follows his words. “And label everything, too. It’s your responsibility to remember where you are.”
No one answers him, but I double-check to make sure I’ve labeled all the slides we’ve done. I’ve had enough ‘mishaps’ this year to know if I don’t, I’ll be doubly surprised when something turns up wrong.
Heath comes to stand next to me and places his hand on the small of my back as he leans down to read the list of instructions. I’ve placed a check mark next to each step we’ve completed in the list, which Heath trails a finger down one by one as he reads.
“We’re more than halfway done,” he says cheerfully.
“I guess so.”
He doesn’t remove his hand until he has to step away to put away the microscope. I shiver a little again, tingles racing across the surface of my skin as he drags his fingers gently across my back for a moment. He notices and grins.
Hegrins.
Shit. What am I doing?
I watch as Heath clears up his portion of the table. He thinks I’m a boy, but that doesn’t change the fact that I like him. There’s no getting around that fact now. He’s been really nice to me lately, and every time Beck starts to do something to me, he’s started to find a way to turn it back around on him.Andhe’s hot, of course. That certainly helps.
Or hurts, depending on how you look at it.
I grab my backpack and swing it over my shoulder as we finish cleaning up. The bell rings, and there’s a surge of activity as everyone gets to their feet, eager to leave.
“See you later,” I tell Heath, slipping into the crowd behind Rafael and letting it carry me away.
“You two seem pretty cozy,” Rafael says once he allows me to catch up. I shift uncomfortably.
“Yeah. I think we are.” I can’t help but feel of two minds about Heath’s shows of affection. If he’s gay … wouldn’t that mean I’m dishonest? Leading him on? But on the other hand, Idolike him. He’s so good-looking. I never could have imagined that someone as hot as him could be interested in me.
He’s not,I remind myself.He’s interested in boy Alex.
I purse my lips. “Well, what about you and Jasper? How did that go?”
Rafael rolls his eyes. “He’s hot. He’s rich. He’s smart. And he’slazy—I prepared most of the slides. All he did was stare at you and Heath.”
My stomach churns as I shoot him a serious glance.
“Yeah, he seemed pretty pissed off.”
Inwardly, I wonder who’s going to get the brunt of that—me, or Heath? Probably me. That’s how it’s usually been, anyway.
Rafael spots Neville in the hallway and waves at him. Neville begins pushing through the crowd enthusiastically in our direction. He’s become a regular fixture now. If I really think about it, I’d say he and I are getting almost as close as me and Rafael.
But we’ll never beasclose.
Not until Neville learns who I really am. And then that would all depend on whether or not he still wants to talk to me at all afterwards.
A sudden, solid pit forms in the middle of my stomach. I’d not thought of that before. How many friends am I going to alienate when the truth eventually comes out … because it will, won’t it? Maybe not until after we graduate. Maybe not until years later when I run into one of them at school or work or a reunion …
I wonder if they’ll even acknowledge me.
Will they even recognize me? Will they even care?
Beside me Rafael checks his watch and swears softly before glancing up at Neville, who’s almost reached us.
“We have our next class together,” he offers by way of explanation. “I think we’re already going to be late.”
I nod. “Sure. I’ll head off, then.”
