Page 69 of West (The Moral Compass 1)
It all makes sense now though. The throwing up, needing to pee every time we get in the car, and the mood swings between loving me to death and then wanting to kill me these last couple of weeks. I’m relieved. Ever since the reporter asked if we were expecting, I’d wanted to bring up the subject with Sutton to see what her thoughts were, but the time was never right. She’s been wanting to get her career sorted and make her mark on the world.
I’ve not seen her since we got the news. I’m currently receiving stitches in my eyebrow from passing out and hitting my head on the edge of Doctor Jameson’s desk. They wouldn’t let Sutton come in with me as the sight of me on the floor gave her a panic attack. What a bloody pair. The nurse has been in and told me that all the family is in the cafeteria, so we will have to face the music sooner rather than later. I want a few minutes with Sutton before we have to discuss everything with them.
The curtain around the bed opens, and a very sheepish Sutton pops her head in.
“Get over here,” I say to her holding my arm out.
“I’m so sorry, West. I have an implant in my arm, you know I do. I don’t know how this has happened. Doctor Jameson said that no birth control is one-hundred percent effective, but I just never thought it would be us.”
“Are you sad, Sutton?” I need to know how she feels.
“Are you?” she deflects.
“No, Sutton, I’m not sad, and I’m not mad. I don’t know how to put into words how I’m feeling, but it’s not bad. It’s good. Actually, it’s the best.”
She smiles and says, “Me too.”
We hold each other for a few more minutes, and the nurse from before comes through.
“Doctor Jameson says we can do the ultrasound today if you would like. He’s had a cancellation.”
I look at Sutton and she nods.
“Might as well while we’re here,” she says.
The nurse doing my stitches leaves the room. “All done. They will dissolve in seven days. Try not to get them wet,” she says as she goes.
I smile at Sutton, but my brain is screaming.
Fuck, this is a little too much.
Fear creeps up my throat, and I look at the door. Sutton doesn’t miss a beat.
“Hey, we don’t have to do this, you know. You don’t have to be involved if you don’t want to. I know it’s not something we have ever talked about, West, but it’s here now and there is nothing I am willing to do about it.” Her words are firm and resolute. Even if I wanted her to, she wouldn’t budge. It’s then I realise I don’t want her to do anything about 'it'.
The nurse, Gloria, settles Sutton on the ultrasound table. Doctor Jameson starts setting everything up, tucking a paper towel down the front of Sutton’s jeans.
A bit too close there, old Jameson.
“I’m just going to squirt some gel on your tummy area. It will be cold, but don’t worry. It’ll soon warm up.”
The screen is all black and white and speckles, and I have no idea what I’m looking at. There are blobs all over the place. Sure, I’ve seen ultrasound pictures before, but really? Do you expect me to even give a shit about a bubble on a piece of paper? I don’t until now. That’smybubble on that screen, and I can’t see a thing. There’s a swishing noise and thumps and rapid sounds, and I’m waiting for the doctor to talk us through it.
“Okay, everything’s looking good,” he states. “Gloria, can you go and see if Doctor Kumar is available? I need him to confirm something for me.”
Gloria disappears. I’m holding Sutton’s hand like it’s the only lifeline I have. He said everything looks fine, so it will be.
“I just want to get a second opinion on something. I can tell you’re worried, but don’t be. I need confirmation before I give you all the news,” he chunters on.
Gloria returns with Doctor Kumar close behind. He looks at the notes Jameson has written and takes over the ultrasound. “Okay, I’m going to take a look, and then I’ll show you what we are discussing,” he says calmly.
After a few more swishes, thumps, and rapid noises, he moves the screen around so that we can see it clearer.
“See here?” He points with the cursor. “That’s a heartbeat.”
My eyes glaze over, and then he moves the mouse slightly to the right.
“And see here? That’s another heartbeat.”
