She swallowed hard but said not a word. I took it as a silent request for me to continue.
“We bonded over When Harry Met Sally. It spooked you how much we had in common and then you tried to bolt on me. I chased you out of McMurphy’s and caught you on the curb. I had to beg you to stay, and I bribed you by promising to roll down my sleeves so you wouldn’t end up pregnant with twins.”
She glanced at my arms, shocking the shit out of me when her hand landed on my forearm. Her voice was thick as she confessed, “I have always had a thing for rolled-up sleeves.”
“Oh, I learned. It’s practically become a way of life now.”
“And McMurphy’s? I ran into you there after the courthouse too. The day I bought Margret Monstera.” Her breath hitched in realization, but it wasn’t the time to turn the conversation into a debate about fate. It was time for me to open up to her…about her.
“It was.”
“But you were so—”
“Failing at pretending I didn’t love you as much then as I do now.” I covered her hand with mine. I fucking hated the way it made her chin quiver, but she didn’t pull away. And that in and of itself was a victory of epic proportions.
“What happened next?” she whispered.
I stared into her blue eyes and told her the God’s honest truth. “I met my soul mate and made an ass out of myself trying to keep her, even then.”
“Bowen,” she breathed.
I traced my thumb back and forth over her hand. I thought it best to keep going. Maybe in giving, I’d get a little more of her back in return. “More specifically, the strap on your dress broke and you flashed me your bra.”
She let out a loud gasp. “No way. I was wearing the cursed dress?”
“Ehh, I prefer to think of it as your lucky dress, but yeah, fine. We’ll go with cursed for now.” Watching the real, true, pure Remi glimmer in her eyes was all the reassurance I needed. “I was willing and very, very ready to do anything to keep you from leaving. So I told you we should let fate decide. If I could find you a safety pin to fix your dress, then you had to stay.”
“Oh, God,” she croaked. “The safety pin. That’s why you carry it.”
“It’s why I still carry it. It’s also why I believe in fate and how I know what we share will never disappear. In one way or another, in and out of your control, you keep running away, but I don’t even have to chase you for the world to bring you back to me. Over and over, we find each other. It’s what we do, baby.”
All her attempts to hide smiles from me failed. As tears slid down her cheek, she grinned cautiously but completely.
“Take all the time you need to figure out who you are. And I hate to do this to you. But I’m about to seriously spoil the ending of this for you.” After catching the stream streaking down her face with my thumb, I curled my hand around the back of her neck. She held her breath as I leaned in close, cheek to cheek, and put my lips to her ear. “We end up together. I don’t know how or when, but it’s the only thing I’m truly certain about.”
Her whole body locked up tight, and then I felt another hot tear slide down both of our cheeks. And if that wasn’t symbolic of our entire relationship, I didn’t know what was.
“Bowen,” she whispered.
“I’m right here, Remi.”
Her shoulders shook with a choked sob. “I need you to go.”
I’d fooled myself into thinking I could pull this off. Pained, I screwed my eyes shut. “It won’t change anything.”
“Please.” She let out another cry. “I’m not strong like you. I can’t walk away from you again.”
Swaying away, I caught her gaze. “So don’t.”
“It’s not that simple.”
“No. I know. I know. You’re still working through stuff. I hate it, but I do understand why it’s something you have to do. But come on. We have four days together. Four. Right now. And then you’re back in Savannah, a whole world between us. Just…” I trailed off, not sure what I was suggesting. I just couldn’t bear the thought of not seizing every single minute I had left with her.
Much like our entire lives together, wasting any opportunity felt like a fucking tragedy.
“Remi,” I begged.
“Please don’t make me ask you again. Go,” she said firmly.
I scrubbed a hand over my face and took a minute to gather myself. That was another fucking lie; I was stalling, praying she’d change her mind. Still, I gave her space, inching away, and then froze while I willed my body to work. I hadn’t taken the first sip of the whiskey I’d ordered, and now it was over before it had even started.
