Page 37 of Some Sort of Happy (Happy Crazy Love 1)
I squeezed my eyes shut against the tears. “She didn’t say it like that. She just pressured me about getting a real job. She knows working for Natalie is only a short-term thing. But I’m not good enough at anything to make finding a new job easy, and I have no college degree and nothing interesting or unique to put on a resume.”
“That’s not true,” he said firmly. “You could be good at anything. You just have to decide what you want.”
“How am I supposed to do that?” I blustered, sitting up swiftly and nearly toppling backward out of the hammock. “I feel like I’ve been impersonating some version of myself for so long, I don’t even know who I am anymore!” To my dismay, I burst into tears, and I was so embarrassed I jumped out of the hammock and ran down toward the dock, where I put my face into my hands and sobbed.
I heard footsteps behind me, and then felt Sebastian’s hand on my shoulder as he turned me into his arms. “Hey, you. Come here.”
His chest was warm and solid, and I collapsed against him, crying into my palms. He rubbed my back and trembling shoulders, shushing me gently.
“Here I thought it was my anxiety I’d struggle with today,” he said after a few minutes. “But you’re a mess.”
I half-laughed, half-sobbed. “Thanks.”
“How much of this is because of that stupid reunion on Saturday?”
“I don’t know. Some of it, I guess.” I took a few hitching breaths, trying to calm down.
“You should blow it off. I think it’s making you feel worse.”
“I know it is. But I have to go. I said I’d help with decorations.” I looked up at him with tearful eyes. “Would you come with me? Please? Just as friends,” I said quickly. “I won’t try anything.”
He smiled but shook his head. “I really can’t, Skylar. It would serve no purpose and just dredge up painful memories. Nothing about high school was good for me.”
Nodding sadly, I wiped my eyes and sniffed. “I understand.”
“Need a tissue?”
“Yeah.”
“Come on. Let’s go find some in the house, and then after I finish the chairs, we’ll go do something fun. How does that sound?”
“Good.” I sniffed again, wondering what his idea of fun was. Algebra? Sudoku? “What’ll we do?”
“I don’t know. Want to go buy a canoe?
I couldn’t help smiling a little, it was so random. “A canoe?”
“Yeah, I’ve been wanting one. Or maybe a rowboat. You can help me decide.”
“All right.”
“Then we’ll bring it back here and take it out on the water if it’s calm enough. How does that sound?”
“Good.”
“Can you paddle a canoe?”
I nodded. “I’m good at it, actually.”
He elbowed me as we walked toward the cabin. “And you said you’ve got nothing for your resume.”
I laughed, my spirits lifting.
• • •
We compared prices of canoes and rowboats at the sporting goods store, but Sebastian seemed less worried about price than he was about buying the perfect boat. He ended up buying a beautiful wooden rowboat plus some oars and an anchor, and the total cost was so high it made me wonder where his money came from. He’d said he worked part-time for his dad, but was that enough to live on, build and furnish that cabin, and have money for luxuries like a boat? Once everything was loaded in the truck and we were on our way back to the cabin, I had to ask.
“So this might be none of my business, and you can tell me to piss off, but without a full-time job, how do you live?” I asked, sucking on the honey stick he’d bought me at the counter. I never could resist those things.
