Page 75 of If They Knew

“I'll help,” I say, thinking this would be the perfect way to get Tyler alone and tell him my thoughts about Mary.

“I'll help too,” says Mary. I roll my eyes and let out a soft grunt of frustration.

“No, I think we have it under control; we’ll be fine,” Tyler responds.

“But I insist,” Mary says, staring directly at me. I instantly feel heat rise in my cheeks. I don’t want to look suspicious, so I smile. “I don't believe you should be doing all of that, under the circumstances, Kelly.”

She’s right, but can't anyone else help?

“Okay, then, Sara, I want you to come with us,” I say, smiling. “Problem solved.”

“Sure, I don’t mind,” Sara responds, although the look on her face suggests she’d prefer not to. I look at Mary, and she is still staring at me. It makes me uneasy.

We carefully take a sheet from inside and place Cyrus’s remains on it. I stand there, refusing to touch any of it, grossed out just by being nearby. While we are outside in the cold, the door shuts. I look back and see everyone else, plastered up against the doors, watching our every move.

“What did you want to tell me?” asks Tyler, lifting the sheet with Cyrus’s remains.

“I can't tell you here; I'll tell you in the atrium,” I respond as quietly as I can, knowing that someone inside might hear what I say.

“What are y'all talking about?” asks Sara.

“I can’t tell you out here, guys. I said I’ll tell you in the atrium,” I say, hoping they will drop it.

As the three of us walk through the medical center with Cyrus’s remains, the entire room stares, and I feel like a spotlight is suddenly beaming on me. I glance over and see Mary still staring at me. I nervously look across the room and see both Julie and Theo, but they’re both looking at Mary. That’s weird. Maybe I’m not the only one who thinks something’s up with her. Maybe I should ask him to come along as well. But before I have the chance to ask, Sara grabs my hand, and we walk out the door.

The atrium is cold and terrifyingly quiet as the creaking from the dilapidated chandelier echoes in the room. The body hanging swings back and forth with the rocking of the ship. The hair on my neck stands when I look up at it and remember the cracking sound his neck made when he fell. Maybe I should've picked somewhere else to talk. Oh well, we are here now.

“Okay, spill the beans — what's going on?” asks Sara, pulling my attention.

“Keep your voice down; I don't want anyone to hear us,” I say.

“Okay, so what is it?” Tyler asks. I pause, glancing around to make sure no one else is around.

“I believe Mary is hiding something,” I say quickly.

“Like what?” asks Tyler.

“I think Mary is the one taking the food.”

“There is no way!” says Sara, laughing. “She's so sweet and always helps everyone. Why would she take food when it contradicts everything she stands for as a nurse?”

“Yeah, I have to agree with Sara on this one, babe. That doesn't sound like Mary,” responds Tyler.

“I thought the same thing. That was until you all lost your minds and did… you know—” I say, glancing down at the bag with Cyrus’s bones. “She didn't eat anything!”

“Yeah, and neither did you,” says Tyler.

“That's my point! I didn't eat anything because I'm not starving—I've been drinking baby formula. When Mary and I were standing back while you all fed yourselves, she said you were only doing that out of survival instincts because your bodies were starving, and that I wouldn't understand because I’m not at that point.”

“Okay? I still don't get it,” says Sara.

“Oh my god! I understand what you're saying,” Tyler replies.

“I'm still confused, so please explain it to me,” says Sara.

“Mary wasn't eating because she wasn't starving. The reason I’m not starving is that I've been eating. If she's not starving, then what has she been eating?” Sara covers her mouth in surprise.

“Maybe, she couldn't bring herself to, you know… do that. She is a nurse, don't they take an oath or something? Wouldn't that go against that?” asks Sara.