Page 238 of Homewrecker

For a while, we sat there and the house just felt peaceful. I was in the same house where I had heard arguments through walls as a kid. The same kitchen where Mama had once sat silent while Daddy tried to explain shit neither Klair nor I were supposed to understand.

The same marriage, the same people, and somehow… peace.

“Are you happy? With Daddy?”

Mama looked at me and smiled. “Yes.”

“After everything?”

“Yes.”

“How?”

She thought for a second. “Peace isn’t the absence of a painful history. It’s being able to remember it without having to live there. We did work together and separate. I had to learn who I was outside of being his wife.”

Mama looked toward the front door. “Your father had to earn access to the version of me that he has now.”

“Do you trust him?”

“I trust me.”

I frowned. “That wasn’t the question.”

“It’s the only answer that matters.”

Mama smiled. “If he ever does something again that breaks what we rebuilt, I know the decisions that I will make and I know that I’ll be okay. I didn’t know that before, but now I do and that’s my peace.”

We heard the garage door and I knew it was Daddy. Mama looked toward the hallway then back at me.

“Oh, Blair.”

“What?”

“Before he comes in…”

“What?”

“I don’t want you leaving here thinking I spent twenty years just sitting around crying every time your daddy embarrassed me.”

“Okay…”

She took a sip of wine. “I cried, plenty. Sometimes in this house. Sometimes in the car. And most times in another man’s arms.”

My entire body froze. “What?”

Mama stood. “I need to put this food away.”

“MAMA.” She picked up my plate. “WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?”

“I said nothing.”

She walked toward the sink and I followed. “Whose arms?”

“Blair.”

“WHO?”

“Mind your business.”