Page 53 of Balance

My stupid dick twitched at that. Because of course it did. It had a Pavlovian response to Matthew’s stern daddy voice.

“Jett was a bastard to you, but his bullshit has no weight here.” Matthew pointed to his head. “And especially not in here.” Then he pointed to his heart. “I care about a lot of Jett’s input, but he doesn’t get to choose who I spend time with. And he’ll never have that power over me. He’s my best friend, but he’s not the most important person in my life.”

He paused, and his expression softened. The knot in my throat relaxed a little. “You are.”

I couldn’t breathe or think or speak. I stood there and stared at him, unblinking. Unmoving. Committing everything about this moment to memory because I knew it was coming. Just like I knew the sun was going to rise tomorrow, and the stars would come out tonight.

“I love you, Troye. I love all the versions of you. The sassy brat. The sweetheart. The good boy. I love the gamer. The philanthropist. The best friend. I love you, Troye, and all your quirks. All your moods.”

It sounded too good to be true, and part of me wanted to argue with him, but he looked so sincere. So wholly and totally focused on me and me alone. It made me feel like somehow he could see inside me and knew the truth about me before I knew it myself sometimes. Like he knew me better than I knew myself. Because now that I heard those words, something in me settled. My jagged pieces found a home inside him, and he didn’t worry about their edges. He didn’t need to because they were right for him.

I slid my hands into his hair and pulled him into a kiss. It was too hard and too fast and had too much teeth and tongue, but the way my chest squeezed, it felt like I might die if I didn’t kiss him.

Matthew matched my ferocity at first, but slowly I became aware that he was taming me. He turned my intensity into something softer, something safer for me to feel. Something safer for me to give him.

“I love you too,” I told him, the words steadier than I expected them to be. “I think I have since that airplane. Or maybe since the hotel room after. But I’ve definitely been in love with you for a while now.”

Matthew’s smile was so bright that it glowed. “You’ve made me almost perfectly happy.”

“Almost?”

He looked deadly serious. “Move in with me. I hate it when you’re not here. I can’t breathe when you leave. We can move to a bigger place if you want, or we can reorganize my office and put your set-up in there. There’s room if we make it.”

“I want to move in with you.” I bit my lip.

“But?”

“Can you… I… I want to move in, and I’m going to say yes, but I think it’s kind of hot when you boss me around. When you tell me what to do. So I’m saying that I’ll say yes, but I want you to like… not be mean about it… but I want you to tell me that that’s what I’m doing, that I don’t have a choice. Even though I’ve already said yes. Does that make sense? Or are we still yellow? Can I ask things like that when we’re yellow?”

“Sweetheart, breathe.” Matthew used his firm daddy voice on me. He smoothed my tears away and kissed my forehead. He was like a living, breathing, safety blanket. Comfort and care washed over me.

“Are we green?” Matthew asked, and I nodded.

“We’re green.”

“I know I asked you to move in, but it was rhetorical. You’re moving in here where Daddy can keep an eye on you. Daddy wants to keep you close, and if you don’t like it, you’re shit out of luck. You’re mine, and I look after my things, and that means I need you here with me. Understand?”

A thrill shivered through me. “Yes, Daddy.”

“Now that’s settled, I think someone’s earned themselves a spanking.”

“What?” My voice rose in pitch. I’d wanted a spanking, hell, I still wanted one, but that didn’t stop me from pretending that I was affronted or offended at the idea that I was about to get one. “What did I do?”

“You didn’t tell me why you were unsettled. You pretended to be fine. Daddy doesn’t like being lied to.”

“That’s not fair.” I pouted, not actually feeling bad about the impending spanking. I’d been angling for one a few minutes ago. Matthew had read me like a book and understood that sometimes I didn’t want to ask for something directly. It wasn’t meant as some kind of test to see if he could read my mind. But sometimes the spankings felt better, bigger, more impactful if I could pretend I hadn’t come out and asked for one. If it felt a little like I had no choice in the matter, it made it hotter for me. It filled cracks in my soul and made me stronger somehow.

Wanting someone to spank your ass was one thing. Asking for it was another thing entirely. Besides, I loved it when Matthew took charge the way he did now. Taking my hand, he led me to his room—our room. When I reached for my fly, Matthew batted my hands away and undid my pants himself. He pulled them down to my knees and stared at my underwear choice of the day.

“They’re white.” Matthew looked up at me in confusion. I never wore boring white underwear.

“You should see the back.” I said, shifting my weight from foot to foot.

Matthew’s gaze narrowed and he made a turning motion with his finger, spinning it in a circle.

I shuffled around, putting my back to him. The underwear might have looked boring and basic at first, but the back said oooh, spank me, Daddy in bright pink curly font.

“For a second, I worried that you’d been body snatched.” Matthew yanked my underwear down to my knees and without warning, smacked my ass. The hit was hard and hot and my cock jumped at the contact, then again at the sting that bloomed on my skin.