Page 115 of The Blessing

chapter 42

no excuses

His stern expression fades away. After giving me another once-over, a small smile tugs on his stern lips. He looks from me to my son, who seems more than eager to meet this brand-new face. Grey usually has good judgment when it comes to people; he can tell a good person from a shitty person from a mile away. So, maybe Ronnie’s dad isn’t so bad after all. Maybe it’s the small smile he’s giving me combined with my son’s reception of him that’s giving me a glimmer of hope. I’ve never really had someone like me right off the bat—so, I definitely didn’t expect that shit from my girl’s dad. I mean, I asked his daughter to marry me without his permission for fuck’s sake. But of course, he doesn’t fucking know that—thank, God.

“Hello, Trevor,” Bryant finally says, his lips twitching in, what seems to be, a semblance of a smile. “It’s good to finally meet you.”

He seems to emphasize “finally,” but I try not to give it too much thought. I know I should’ve come to him sooner but planning two steps ahead has never seemed to be my forte. I don’t think shit through until it’s too late to change anything; so, me not going about things the “conventional way” isn’t exactly shocking. “It’s good to meet you, too,” I respond, closing the distance between us to shake his hand. I give him a smile—hoping to God I don’t look too fucking skittish—and look him straight in the eyes as I give his hand two firm pumps before pulling away. I don’t want him to get the misconception that I’m going to be a giant pussy about meeting him today.

I take a step back and prop Grey up in my arms so he’s resting against my shoulder. He looks at Bryant with wide, inquisitive eyes, then looks back to me to see how I feel about this stranger. “This is my son, Greyson,” I introduce Grey while encouraging him to turn his attention to Ronnie’s dad.

My son gives Bryant a shy smile before reaching out to grab ahold of his finger. He gives it a little shake on his own before he attempts to stuff said finger into his mouth. Ronnie’s dad chuckles at this and pulls his finger out of the baby’s grasp before tousling his hair.

“Cute kid,” he comments in a gruff voice. “How old is the boy?”

“He’ll be one in January.”

“They sure do grow up fast. It feels like it was just yesterday when Veronica and Eden were that little. They were constantly getting into trouble, those two,” he muses with a thoughtful smile and a shake of his head.

“Well, Ronnie’s definitely a good girl now.” Fuck. What an awkward fucking thing for me to say. She may call you “father,” sir, but she calls me “daddy.” What am I going to say next? I’ll spank his daughter if she’s a “bad” girl. Her dad gives me a weird look—well, that’s an understatement. His look screams: “What the fuck is this man doing with my daughter that has him fucking blushing like that!” I give him an awkward smile before quickly changing the subject. “Do you want to hold Grey? He loves meeting new people.” Well, that’s a lie, but I’d say anything to get him to stop looking at me like a demented fuck and divert this conversation.

Bryant lightens up and nods. I breathe a sigh of relief as I hand my son over. Grey’s a little fussy at first, but after a few moments he settles down and becomes comfortable. It’s obvious that despite his rough exterior he loves kids. I wonder if, despite his appearance, he’s just a big fucking softie. Well, I sure as hell hope so. Even if he does like me, I know he’ll still likely ask me a barrage of questions and all of that shit. It’s a natural thing for a father to do, considering the circumstances. I mean, even my own family members would ask me tons of intrusive questions every time they saw me when I was growing up. Would the holidays really be the same if someone didn’t get all up in your business just to make you doubt yourself? Probably not. I hate being grilled by anyone. It just feels like you’re being judged with every answer you give. I hated it when I was a kid and I still fucking hate it as an adult.

“So, are you guys doing anything special for the boy’s birthday?” Bryant asks as he rocks my son back and forth.

Happy he’s not asking me any personal questions, I’m quick to respond. “Yeah, Ronnie and I were planning on giving him a really nice party. I don’t have many people to invite, but I’m sure it’ll be fun regardless.” I wish I had more friends and family to surround my son with, but there’s only few people I trust around him, and that’s the best I can do. I’ve always been an introvert, and nothing’s changed since I’ve grown-up. I never was, nor will I ever be, “Mr. Popularity.” I’ll never be comfortable with being surrounded by people all of the time.

Bryant doesn’t give any input on it because he’s too busy playing with my little guy. I look over to Ronnie, who tilts her head toward the kitchen and since her dad seems distracted enough—I follow her. I don’t have enough time to ask her what’s up before she closes the distance between us and crashes her lips to mine. Within a few seconds, she’s completely molded herself against me and her hands are everywhere. Apparently, me getting along with her dad is a real turn-on for her. I return the kiss with just as much enthusiasm until I have to pull away to catch my breath.

“What was that for?” I ask as I try to regain my composure.

“I’m just happy to see you two getting along so well,” she explains. “You both are the most important men in my life.”

This makes me smile. “Did you really have doubts?”

She shrugs her shoulder before giving me a thoughtful look and shaking her head. “No, I suppose I didn’t. I was sure my dad would like you.”

I can’t tell how honest she’s being, but I’m happy she’s happy. I’m thrilled she believes he likes me because I can’t fucking tell with the man. It’s not like we really interacted much, so I guess I haven’t given him a reason to hate me so far. However, I know my appearance can be a bit off-putting for some people. Not every father wants his little girl with someone that looks like me. It seems that Bryant is able to look past this aspect, though. Hopefully, he’ll be just as cool when it comes to looking past everything else. My past is pretty fucking rough, and he seems to be pretty straight-edged from what I can tell. I know he’s not going to like the fact I was into drugs and alcohol; even though I’m currently trying to work on that part of myself by going to therapy and A.A. meetings. Honestly, I wouldn’t mind it if he never found out about my past. However, I know I really need to be truthful and forthcoming with everyone in my life for my recovery to be a success. Today, I’m just going to focus on getting to know him and having a good time with our families. Hopefully, this will be the start of something positive and new.

“Can you hang out with my dad while I finish getting ready?”

I look at the towel wrapped around her head and pray that it won’t take her too long. I know I fared well when we were all together, but I wonder how he’ll act once she’s no longer in the room. Although, what the fuck am I supposed to do? Hide in the bathroom with her like a coward? It’ll be fine, Trevor. Stop fucking stressing.

“Yeah, that’s fine. I got this under control.”

She gives me one last kiss before bolting in the direction of her bathroom. I return to the living room—which has now been turned into an impromptu dining room—and find Bryant sitting at the table still holding Grey. I hear my son giggling, so I know that everything’s all right. I’m happy, if not surprised, my son’s taken to his future granddad so quickly. Babies are good at sensing good people—from what I’m told—so, maybe this is a good sign.

“I hope he wasn’t too fussy while I was gone,” I say conversationally as I join them at the dining room table.

Bryant looks up at me for a moment then directs his gaze back to the baby in his arms. “He’s great. Veronica talks about him all of the time, so I feel like I know the little guy already.”

“So, you two talk on the phone a lot then?”

“A fair amount. I’m busy most of the time, but I call Veronica to catch-up whenever we’re both free. She hadn’t told me about the engagement, though. I didn’t find out about it until I arrived this morning.”

Fuck.So, he does fucking know. I hope he isn’t upset about all this. I know how much father’s like to be a part of this type of shit. It’s traditional for the guy to ask for the girl’s hand in marriage—but it wasn’t like it was really a possibility at the time.Besides, it’s the twenty-first century. I don’t believe women need their fathers to decide who they can or cannot marry. Everything had been so spontaneous in our relationship and it all happened so fast. I’d been so fucking nervous to ask her in general. I hadn’t even thought about talking to her dad first. I mean, I didn’t even know anything about the man, so it’d be weird for me to randomly ask for his number and call him. “Sir, we’ve never met, but I’m in love with your daughter. We’ve been together for a little bit and I’ve never really asked about meeting you. However, now I kind of need you. I’m going to ask her to marry me. I’m probably not the ideal choice you’d pick for her because I’m a single dad, but I think I’d be really good for her.”I would’ve been a rambling fucking mess if I called him. I feel sick just thinking about it.

“Sorry about that, sir.” I feel like I need to be formal all of a sudden. I mean, formality couldn’t hurt. “It was a spur of the moment thing. I just love her so much… I couldn’t help myself.”