Page 132 of Instigator

And when she comes, her body shaking from pleasure, I know this was worth the wait. Worth the heartache and the stress. Seeing her come apart like this… I’ve never seen anything more beautiful.

Breathing hard, Ceci reaches down and turns off the vibrator, and the ensuing silence echoes in my eardrums. She carefully lifts off my cock, then settles her weight on my thighs and collapses against my heaving chest.

I waste no time in wrapping my arms around her, holding her as tight as possible. My eyes water, and I blink a few times to clear them.

There are too many emotions warring within me to parse out. Satisfaction, yes. Exhaustion, yes. Also relief. There’s something else hovering around the edges. Something I can’t identify. Don’t want to identify.

And love. Overwhelming affection for the woman in my arms, in my bed. She has my everlasting devotion, from now until forever.

And fuck, if she keeps edging me, if she keeps calling me her good boy, I might really never let her go. I never thought I’d like that as much as I did.

After a few minutes, Ceci rolls off me and onto her side. But she doesn’t go far. Her palm lands on my chest, over my heart, and I cover her hand with mine.

“This is it, isn’t it?” she whispers. “You and me. This is the real thing?”

“Yeah, Annie,” I reply. “This is forever.”

forty-nine

. . .

Ceci

The back room of the bookstore is loud with chatter and laughter as I move through the stacks for our monthly book club meeting. Every third Thursday is the highlight of my month because I get to spend it with my friends. My crazy, loud, fun, coupled-up friends.

And now I’m coupled up too. Still can’t believe how much has changed in the last two months.

Aidan’s on a ten-night, five city West Coast road trip. I’ve spent every night so far on his side of the mattress, breathing in his scent on the sheets of the bed we share. When he gets to his hotel room for the night, we’ll game together for a bit, just like old times.

He was right; being apart does draw us closer. It helps us recreate the circumstances in which we met, the way we grew so close and then fell in love.

Hailey and I took a rideshare together since she doesn’t drive and I hate doing it. Her ring sparkles in the harsh fluorescent lighting of the bookstore.

“How does it feel?” I ask her as I bring her a glass of orange juice and a lemon-blueberry scone. It’s a little hard to navigate snacks and drinks with a cane.

“How does what feel?”

“It’s the first big road trip since you got married. Does it feel different?”

The guys have gone away for two or three nights at a time, but nothing like a week and a half.

The blond cocks her head, considering. “Not really. I still miss him. Sometimes it’s nice when he goes away, though. It gives me a chance to miss him.”

“I think I finally understand that.”

I love Aidan, and I love spending time with him. But I also appreciate my space. In a way, it’s almost perfect that he travels so much. I get enough time to reset and recalibrate on his away games, and I’m ready to be my regularly charming self when he’s back.

Sadie, our fearless leader, calls the meeting to order. We go around the circle and introduce ourselves to the newcomers, sharing our name, our favorite tropes, and our current read.

From there, conversation turns to our topic of the evening: the revenge dating trope, yay or nay.

Bex and Audrey have extremely strong opinions about the theme, and Vanessa and Riley aren’t shy about making their opinions known either. Johanna, Arielle, and Rachel sit back and talk between themselves as the conversation whips back and forth. Usually, I’m jumping into the fray with the rest of them, but tonight I’m content to sit back and let them argue around me.

Is this personal growth?

Nah. Sounds fake.

My entire body is alight with a buzz, and it has nothing to do with the gin and tonic I’m sipping. It almost feels like… contentment. It’s such a foreign concept, and at the same time, it’s as familiar as breathing.