Page 53 of Zero Confusion

They would never be truly happy.

But that wouldn’t happen to Zach and Miles. Their days were numbered. Literally.

“I’m sorry,” Zach whispered, the words catching in his throat, a pathetic attempt to convey the depth of his sympathy. “And thank you. I…I think I needed to hear that.”

The warning swirled around his head as he trudged over to the coop and fed the hens. Raymond’s face haunted him—the tortured expression, the faraway look in his eyes. Zach’s heart broke for him. He couldn’t help but draw the comparison between himself and Raymond—they were free to be themselves elsewhere, yet stifled by the constraints of this small town.

A shiver ran up his spine despite the warm, stagnant air. Could he do this full-time? Could he live this lie for Miles’s sake? He didn’t think he could. Not even for the love of his life. It was bearable now only because this was temporary, but Raymond didn’t have his own Portland to escape to. He didn’t have an end date. Unless Max changed his mind, the rest of Raymond’s life would be spent in hiding, unable to ever truly be himself.

Zach was gripping an egg so tightly it was a wonder it hadn’t broken. He gently set it with the rest and flopped down on the straw-covered ground next to a flock of squawking hens pecking at their feed. He watched them eat, occasionally throwing out another handful, until a familiar voice broke through his gloomy thoughts.

“Are we paying you to sit around and play with the chickens?”

Miles sauntered inside the coop and lowered himself next to Zach, leaving no space between them. Sweaty warmth radiated from his every pore, pouring into Zach like a magic elixir. He grinned despite himself and nudged Miles with an elbow.

“Paying me? I must have missed that part of the contract.”

“Good point.” Miles’s eyes crinkled at the corners. “Will you accept sexual favors as wages?”

Yes, please. Fuck, Zach loved how readily Miles could talk about things like that—no stuttering, no euphemisms, no shame in what he wanted. Everything with Miles was easy. Seamless. Like it was meant to be.

He cleared his throat and pretended to consider Miles’s suggestion. “I’m sure we can work out a payment plan.”

Instead of keeping the joke going, Miles leaned in and brushed his lips against Zach’s, slowly increasing the pressure until Zach had no choice but to melt into the aggressive kiss.

Suddenly, Miles lurched back and put a foot of space between them. Zach didn’t have time to wonder why before Anthony appeared in the doorway.

“Zach.” If he was surprised to see Miles sitting there, he didn’t show it. “There’s sandwiches in the kitchen.”

“Thank you, Mr. Carter.”

He gave a terse nod and left.

“Phew, that was close.” Miles laughed and sprang up. “Gotta get back to the field. Just wanted to come by and say hi.”

When he was alone, Zach squeezed his eyes shut to fight back tears. Yes, it had been too close. For both of them. It wasn’t just about Zach anymore. His secret had the potential to ruin Miles’s life as well, and, unlike him, Miles hadn’t spent the last few years preparing to leave his family behind. For better or worse, Miles belonged here.

Zach wouldn’t ruin that.

Chapter 20

MILES

Miles sprinted to the house as soon as he finished his chores, heading straight to Mara’s room. He’d almost forgotten about the picture on Zach’s laptop, but something about sitting side by side in the coop had jogged his memory. He took the stairs two at a time and banged on her door.

“What?” Mara barked out from inside.

“Can I come in?”

Her exasperated groan sounded like reluctant agreement, and Miles turned the knob to peek in. Mara was at her desk, typing furiously, the clacking of the keyboard strangely aggressive. Miles paused. “Is it a bad time?”

“No.” She slammed the laptop shut and turned around. “Just looking at colleges. Did you need something?”

“You’re quite a surly teenager, anyone ever tell you that?” Miles chuckled and ducked the pen she threw at him. “Do you remember when you took some pictures of me and Zach with the tractor?”

Mara scrunched her face in confusion. “Like, a million years ago?”

“Something like that.”