Page 41 of One Day at a Time

‘Wow, you’re living the dream,’ she said, laughing.

‘Yep, the open road with a guitar, a cappuccino and a maple doughnut. I believe Garth started out this way too.’

Was she imagining it, or was there a bubble of excitement in his voice? Maybe he was just in a great mood. Should she tell him now? Or should she wait until he came home next week? Right at that moment, the baby delivered a swift kick to her ribcage. She took it as a sign…

‘Speaking of living the dream, how’s it going out there? Do you have your return flight booked yet?’ If he was coming home in the next few days as planned, she could wait to tell him. Or should she just say it now? She should. She would. Wouldn’t she? Another kick to the ribs gave her the answer. She could do this.

‘That’s why I was calling,’ he began.

Yes! He was phoning with his flight details. Relief!

‘Do you want the great news or the great news?’

Maddie stretched back, rubbing her back, but forcing enthusiasm into her voice as she tried to match his energy. She sent a silent apology to the baby for her cowardice, but he sounded so happy tonight and she didn’t want to spoil that. The news could wait a day or two. Even if she told him right before he got on the flight, at least he’d have half a day toprocess it. In the meantime… ‘Oh, well I suppose I’ll go with the great news.’

‘The tour has been extended right through to the end of February. The record company are throwing everything behind this. They’ve arranged for studio time and asked me to record my first three tracks over the next two weeks, so I’m not going to be able to get home.’

She wanted to point out that wasn’t good news. It really, really wasn’t.

Tell him. Just say it.

But he was still on a roll that she didn’t want to interrupt. ‘I was just saying to the guys in the band that stuff like this just doesn’t happen to people like me, Maddie. All those years I was married and tied down, this was all I wanted. I kept telling myself that I’d made a mistake and I just had to live with it. But now… It’s like I can finally have the life I was supposed to have all along.’

Tell him. Just say it.

Her mouth wouldn’t cooperate with her brain. Instead, it was circling back to what he’d said earlier.

‘You said there were two pieces of good news? What was the other one?’

‘Do your emails come to your phone?’ Why did he sound so fricking excited. This just proved that he had no feelings for her. He didn’t seem sad about not seeing her at all.

‘Yes.’ He was probably sending a list of things he’d like her to do for him. Starting with sorting out that storage…

‘Open your emails. I’ve just sent one to you.’

With a sick feeling and a deep sigh, she flicked on to her emails, and there it was. She opened it, gasped…

‘I got an advance on my deal, so I bought you a ticket. If I can’tcome home, I figured you might fancy a wee trip over here. It’s for next Sunday. Please tell me you can come.’

21

ORLA

Kyle came up behind her in the hallway and stretched around to kiss her cheek. It was just after 7.30 am, and he still smelled of the deodorant he always used after his morning shower. ‘I’m off to work. I’ll see you later and don’t forget that we’re going out tonight.’

Orla put the lid back on the lipstick she’d just applied. ‘I won’t forget. Are you going to tell me where we’re going yet?’

He shook his head. ‘Nope, it’s a surprise. You’d have to torture it out of me and I’m not sure you’d manage that in your condition.’

‘Oh, I’d find a way,’ she said breezily, trying to join in the joke. On the outside, maybe she managed to pull it off, but on the inside there was still that knot of anxiety that seemed to have taken up permanent residence in her gut. She had to let this go. She just had to. As he’d pointed out many times, he’d made one mistake. She had to force herself to leave it in the past.

Only it wasn’t one mistake, was it? A mistake was putting a pink bra in a white wash. Or filling the car up with diesel instead of petrol. What he’d done was choose a premeditateddouble life filled with months of choices to betray her. The fight that had been battling in her head for months kicked right off again.

Since the truth had come out, it had felt like she was the one who’d been living a double life. They were sharing a bedroom again, being the perfect couple, doing and saying all the right things. But inside, there were so many questions. She believed the affair was over, but would she ever trust him completely again? Would she ever feel completely secure? If she wasn’t pregnant, would she be giving him another chance? In the core of her being, she knew the answer to that was no. Did she still love him? Yes, she did. And did she want to tear their family apart before their child was born? No. That’s why, for her sake, for their daughter’s sake and, yes, for him too, she had to make this work. Kyle had told her a hundred times over the last couple of months that he loved her, that they were going to be the family she’d always dreamt of. She just had to hang in there and keep pushing the hurt down so that she could believe that too, despite her moments of doubt. And today was just another of those moments.

‘Are you at least going to tell me the dress code?’ She wanted to make sure she didn’t add being over or under-dressed to her anxiety levels.

‘Pretty,’ he said, as he opened the front door. ‘That’s it. Just pretty. Like you always are.’