Page 54 of Ride or Die

“I’d love a tea,” I say, placing my bag down.

Following Mama Joy into the kitchen, my smile lingers as I glance at the small table, finding a half-finished game of Monopoly spread out, a coloring book I’ve never seen before, next to what looks to be a brand-new box of crayons.

“Just a few things I brought from home,” Mama Joy says, noticing where I’m looking.

“Oh, thank you.” I smile. “I don’t even think the kids have ever seen Monopoly before.”

She chuckles a throaty laugh as she pours steaming water into two cups. “Billie tried for a while, but then she gave up and started coloring. But ol’ Tommy is quite the budding property mogul.” She waggles her eyebrows and I sniff a laugh because that sounds like my boy.

“Actually, I have a lot of stuff up at the house,” Mama Joy continues, walking around the counter and carefully handing me one of the mugs. “I can drop ’em by.”

“Oh, thanks. But you don’t have to do that.”

She waves another hand. “I could never bring myself to get rid of anything after the kids all left. I’d hoped maybe one day Austin might meet someone he can stand for longer than fiveminutes and maybe start a family… but—” She sighs. “It’s just collectin’ dust. Does Billie like Barbie dolls?”

I can’t help but scoff because the question is almost rhetorical. “She sure does.”

Sadness rolls through me and I force my gaze down at my mug, thinking of all the things Billie and Tommy were forced to leave behind.

“I’ve got a whole box of ’em in the attic,” Mama Joy continues, pulling me from my thoughts. “My Millie would love to see ’em go to someone with almost as much sass as she has.”

I want to decline, because when we leave, we’re not going to be able to take everything with us, but then I remember what Cole said to me last night about accepting help so, instead, I manage an appreciative smile. “Thank you.”

“Come on, now”—Mama Joy links her arm through mine—“let’s go sit out and enjoy the moonlight.”

We walk outside and take a seat next to one another on the steps. The silence around us is calm and easy, the night air warm and thick, carrying with it the scent of redbuds that I’ve grown to love.

“Were the kids behaved?” I ask.

“Oh, baby, those two kids of yours are the most well-behaved, sweetest, polite not just children, but human beings I’ve ever come across in my sixty-four years on this here earth.”

“Yeah.” I can’t help but beam with pride, smiling down at my tea. “They’re pretty great.”

“Cole said you don’t know how long you’re gonna be in town for.”

My smile slips at the question in Mama Joy’s words, and I don’t chance a look at her as I say, “As soon as I have enough money saved up, we’ll be back on the road.”

“Where y’all headed?” she asks so innocently, but something tells me she knows. I glance at her to find my suspicions confirmed, her smile wry yet understanding.

“I thought I knew,” I say honestly, voicing the thoughts that have been plaguing my mind the last few days especially.

“But now?” she presses in a way that doesn’t feel suffocating or pushy, but makes me comfortable enough opening up to her.

I release a sigh, my shoulders sagging. “Now, I’m not so sure.” With a smile, I look out over the yard. “I never thought in a million years we’d end up in Texas but… I don’t know… this place isn’t so bad.”

Mama Joy doesn’t say anything, but her silence is noisy in a way that makes me look at her. And, when I do, I see something she wants to say but doesn’t for some reason.

“What is it?” I arch a brow, waiting.

“Billie said somethin’ tonight,” she begins and immediately my hackles are up. She must notice because she’s quick to place a hand on my arm. “Nothin’ bad, baby, I promise you. She said she likes it here.” Mama Joy smiles. “She said she don’t wanna leave.”

I clamp my bottom lip between my teeth, looking down. It’s not surprising. Billie has been so happy here. And Tommy is thriving, coming out of his shell for the first time in what feels like ever. But staying here? In Texas? If they’re happy here then who am I to take that from them? Everything I’m doing, I’m doing it for them. God knows I’ve already taken enough.

“This place and the people in it ain’t perfect, baby, but I’ve lived a happy life here, raised three amazin’ kids,” Mama Joy continues. “It’s home, y’know?”

I nod because I do know. “We’ve only been here a few weeks, and this place feels more like a home than anywhere else.”

“So then why you runnin’, baby?”