Page 81 of A Dark and Drowning Tide

“I don’t know. How is one supposed to feel when their entire life has been upended? My aspirations, my plans, any illusion I still had of my mother caring forme...Allof it is shattered.” Sylvia’s expression turned desolate. “How could she keep me in the dark about this? Did she expect that I wouldcomply—orthat I wouldn’t? I do not know which is worse. I . . .”

She pressed the heels of her hands against her eyes, and Lorelei struggled to keep the alarm off her face as Sylvia’s shoulders began to shake. God, she could not bear it when people cried. She never had been any good at this sort of thing.

“Would you like me to make you some tea?” she asked. “I’m afraid it’s the best I can offer, short of seeing her imprisoned when we return to Ruhigburg.”

Sylvia let out a startled laugh through her tears. “You’re awful.”

“I’m aware.” With a sigh, Lorelei pulled her handkerchief from her breast pocket and handed it to her. It was a rough scrap of linen, nothing so fine as the embroidered silk ones Sylvia carried, but still, she smiled at Lorelei as though she’d given her something precious.

“I suppose you have a point in that all we can do is move forward.” Sylvia held her gaze with a conviction that made Lorelei’s mouth go dry. “One way or another, when we return, I will see my mother pay for what she has done. I will claim my rightful title as the duchess of Albe and do what is best for my people.”

“Is independence not what’s best for them?”

“I meant what I said. I intend to stand with Wilhelm. He is not perfect, but he has not mistreated us. War would see so many lives lost.” Sylvia sighed. “For what? The Albisch fear our culture being taken from us. We are proud ofit—understandablyso. But the way that pride hasmanifested...Itunsettles me.”

She was clearly thinking of the effigies.

“Beyond that, Wilhelm’s reign would not survive an Albisch coup, and God knows there are far worse people than him waiting in the wings. I have seen who Johann keeps company with.” Sylvia frowned. “I will have to do my best to maintain order. It will require meeting with my subjects, a thorough review of my mother’scorrespondence—and,certainly, reconsidering the positions of those she has kept close in court.”

“A controversial vision for the new duchess of Albe,” Lorelei mused. “You’ll be stripped of your title within the year.”

Sylvia smiled fondly at her. “I so appreciate your vote of confidence.”

“I do have confidence in you.” She was surprised to find that she meant it. A strange, bittersweet feeling lodged itself in her throat. “I shall look forward to seeing what you achieve from afar.”

“Afar?” Sylvia echoed. “I had hoped . . .”

“What, that I would come with you?”

“If you would like to.” She sounded uncharacteristically uncertain. It made Lorelei suspicious.

Lorelei blinked slowly. “Forgive me. I think I might’ve suffered lasting brain damage from my strangulation.”

Sylvia flushed a charming shade of red. “I should have known better than to express a single tender sentiment to the likes of you.”

“Don’t mistake me,” Lorelei said, more bristly than she had intended. Softening her voice, she added, “I appreciate the invitation.I...amonly confused.”

“It is not a trap!” Sylvia protested. “Perhaps you could advise me instead of Wilhelm. Or perhaps you could spend your days skulking about,doing...whateverit is you wish to do. It does not matter to me.”

Lorelei felt suddenly light-headed. Of all things, it was anger coursing through her. She had not spent her entire life afraid and striving just for Sylvia von Wolff to offer her an escape rope as though it were nothing. “Why would you propose such a thing?”

For a long while, silence thickened around them, until Lorelei could scarcely breathe. She felt wild and out of sorts. It was only when she could no longer bear the weight of it that Sylvia laughed. It was abreathless sound, bewildered and exasperated and somehow wholly relieved. She raked her hands through her hair, pulling apart her waves. Errant strands rose around her like wisps of white fire. “Do you really want me to spell it out for you?”

“Spell outwhat?”

Lorelei was beginning to feel hysterical. She did not know what exactly they were talking about anymore, but she sensed Sylvia working herself up to something. Sylvia stepped closer, and Lorelei’s focus narrowed to the precious little space between them. Lorelei could hear Sylvia’s shaky breaths. She could feel the press of her body against hers, Sylvia’s warmth seeping into the weave of her coat.

“How can you be so smart andso...sostupid!”

“I beg your pardon!”

“I’m trying to tell you that I care for you, you impossible woman!” Her face flushed. “Are you happy now? Surely you’ve known for years.”

Lorelei opened her mouth, and for the second time tonight, she was speechless. All that came out was a strangled sound, something between a croak and a muffled groan. When she finally recalled their shared language, all she could manage was a weak “I did not know that.”

“Butyou...Youmust have! It was so obvious. The way you would mock me when you caught me looking at you,or...theway you . . .” Sylvia trailed off helplessly as she realized she had shared far more than she’d ever planned to. She buried her face in her hands and made a sort of pained, dying sound. And when she dropped her arms and saw Lorelei still standing there, slack-jawed and wild-eyed, it apparently dawned on her that there was no going back from this. “How could you not know I wanted you?”

Never in her life had Lorelei been subjected to so many emotions at once. “How could I have possibly known? If you truly wantedme”—shestumbled over thewords—“whyhave you been such a menace all this time?”