Page 42 of Razor

“You are not him.”

“Leave it.”

An ominous growl rumbles in my chest, and he leans forward, his glare scorching my soul.

“You hide behind your fucking beard because you are afraid of what lies beneath it. Look at me, Razor. I am identical to you, so what do you see when you look at me?”

“I said, leave it.”

I glare at him, my fist curling, the jagged edge of the scar on his face reminder enough of what that man was capable of – whatweare capable of.

“What happened wasn’t your fault.”

He has repeated this sentence most days since it happened, and I will never be convinced that he is right.

I hold a burning hole in my heart that our father set alight all those years ago, which has never diminished. It’s a part of me now and probably always will be, which is probably why I have huge commitment issues.

“What if she leaves?”

Blade changes direction, and I’m shocked at how much his words stab me on repeat.

Just the idea of Sunday walking away from me is too hurtful to imagine. Not hearing her sweet voice, receiving her cute smile, and unable to taste those sweet lips and slide into her after a grueling day.

I close my eyes against the pain of that, accepting it will happen one day but not prepared to dwell on the subject for long.

I’ll deal with that when it happens.

“Then she leaves.”

It takes all of my strength to say the words with a lack of emotion that is so not the case. My world would end if Sunday left. I know it, and so does my brother. I can’t fool him because it would be like lying to myself.

“You’re gonna lose her if you don’t let go of the past.”

“Then I’ll lose her.”

I stand, my heart racing, my anger brewing, and my attention shifting onto the sudden ache in my chest. There is only one solution to this problem, and without another word, I leave my brother behind in the gym and stride off with purpose.

He doesn’t follow me; he made his point. He did it on purpose because he always had the ability to read me like a book. It’s the same with me. I’m aware of his thoughts before he voicesthem. An undeniable bond between twins, which gives him the right to comment, no matter how I hate facing the truth.

I type out a text.

You got a minute, darlin’?

The words disappear into fuck knows where and I head to my room, a shower the most important thing right now.

The three dots dance on the screen, and then her reply comes through.

I’m just finishing up restocking the bar. I could meet you in ten.

Meet me at my place.

Everything falls back into place as I move toward the Reaper block, intent on a cool shower and spending the rest of the day inside my girl. She has become a coping mechanism. My first port of call in a storm, and I ignore the fact that one day she won’t be there to answer it.

I would never ask her to stay. Never ask her to give her soul to mine because I simply do not deserve a woman like her, and she doesn’t deserve for me to ruin her life.

CHAPTER 22

SUNDAY