Page 78 of Untamed
I swallow hard. I understand that feeling. The need to do whatever it takes to avoid feeling the pain you’re in.
It’s what I’ve been doing for years.
And I convinced myself I was being noble about it. Like I was a good guy for being upfront and honest with the women who crossed my path. I patted myself on the back and gave myself a gold star.
Unable to admit that at the end of the day, all I was really doing was using them.
“I tried to hide my pregnancy from him.” Ruth continues telling her story, oblivious to the way it’s imploding my own sense of self. “Made sure I was off work when I knew he was coming into town. Changed my phone number. Moved apartments. Got a different car. Did everything I could to keep him from finding out.” Her lips flatten. “But then one day one of the newer front desk attendants mentioned that the general manager was about to have a baby, and everything fell apart.”
“Things do have a way of falling apart when you least expect it.”
Like right now. I’m fucking crumbling.
Ruth huffs out a humorless laugh. “You can say that again.” She reaches out to toy with the front of my shirt as she continues. “William hired a private detective to stalk me, and once he knew for sure I was pregnant, he started calling me. Threatening me.” Her expression turns sad. “He spread lies about me at the hotel. Everyone there turned on me. And two days after I had Birdie, I was fired. Luckily I’d been saving as much as I could, because all the lies he told followed my resume everywhere I sent it.”
“You came to me because the money ran out.” And thank God it did or she would have gone to Maryland without our paths ever crossing.
And that possibility is almost unbearable to consider. Almost as hard to imagine as what I’m going to do when she’s gone.
Ruth presses her lips together, like she doesn’t want to admitwhat brought her to my doorstep. “I didn’t know what else to do.”
“You did the right thing.” The rightest thing. Because I will make sure she and Birdie are always okay. Even if I have to do it from across the country.
Ruth’s eyes dip before coming back to mine. “I agree.” She sucks in a breath like she’s about to say more.
But I don’t get to find out what it is. Because instead of elaborating, Ruth has her mouth on mine again, kissing me in a way she hasn’t before. It’s not fake or sweet or accidental.
It’s desperate. A little frantic. Just like the hands in my hair and the soft body rubbing against mine. It’s like she can’t get close enough. And I’d hate for her not to get what she wants.
Especially when what she wants is more of me.
Gripping her ass, I lift Ruth off the ground, holding tight as I carry her down the hall and into my bedroom. Shifting my grip, I keep an arm banded across her back as I crawl onto the mattress. Lowering Ruth to the blankets I push up to my knees, taking a second to stare down at her. To bask in the sight of her dark hair splayed across the spot where I rest my head at night. I memorize the way she looks up at me, cheeks flushed, pupils dilated.
Nothing will ever be as beautiful as this. As her. I want to strip her bare and track every curve of her body with my hands and mouth.
So that’s what I’m going to do.
Her shirt is gone in quick order, tossed to one side. It probably hasn’t even hit the floor before I’m reaching for the waistband of her pajama pants. Hooking my fingers into the elastic, I peel away the stretchy, soft pants, tossing them to one side as I drink her in. She’s so fucking sexy. All curves and softness. Trailing the fingers of each hand up the legs bracketing my hips, I trace a path over her knees and up her thighs, flattening my palmswhen I reach her hips so I can sink my fingers into the plushness there.
Everything about Ruth is lush. Her hair. Her voice. Her body. Her lips. After months of struggling to hold interest in anyone, it’s plain to see why she’s the one who finally got my attention. Why she’s the woman I can’t stop thinking about having in any way she’ll let me.
I don’t realize how long I’ve been staring until she moves to cover herself. It’s a shyness I haven’t witnessed from her before. It’s unexpected. Unusual.
And unwarranted.
I catch her wrists, pulling her hands away from the bounty I plan to fully enjoy. “Is there a reason you don’t want me looking at you?”
Ruth’s uncertainty tugs at my heart. I don’t want her to ever feel that way around me.
She huffs out an annoyed breath, making me smile. “I’m just not used to anyone seeing me naked is all.”
I angle a brow. “I know where babies come from, Ruthless. Someone saw you naked.” Someone I don’t want to think about right now because I’ll just get angry again. Start plotting. Come up with a way to ensure he never crosses Ruth’s path again.
And I’ll have plenty of time for that tomorrow since it’s a Saturday.
Ruth rolls her eyes. “I mean lately.” She rubs her lips together, eyes leaving mine. “Things are different than they used to be, and you seemed to be inspecting them pretty closely, and…”
I wait for her to finish, but she doesn’t. So I prompt, “And?”
