Page 166 of Saint Céline
“Yes. We have covered that already.”
The spoon stopped moving in her hand without warning. She wanted the wound out in the open.
“You paid him to scare me.”
“I paid him to contact you.”
“That difference does not help you.”
“It was not supposed to; I’m just laying out the facts.”
She stared at me.
The rain pressed gently against the windows behind her. Miss Astoria, apparently finished with dinner, jumped onto the window ledge and began cleaning one paw with aristocratic satisfaction.
“I should hate you more,” she said.
“Yes.”
“I do hate you.”
“I know.”
“No, I do not think you do.” Her voice stayed low, which meant the anger had gone deeper. “You think naming things means you understand them. You think my hatred is interesting because it keeps me close enough for you to study. But you need to hear this, Vincent. You reached into the worst part of my life and made it useful to you.”
“I know.”
Her eyes sharpened. “Then how can you sit there feeding me soup?”
“Because you still need to eat.”
She looked away. I watched the line of her throat move when she swallowed. She hated being cared for by someone she could not trust. I understood that. I also knew it made the moments when she let me anyway feel sharper.
“You are not sorry,” she said.
“No.”
That brought her eyes back to mine.
“I regret that he came to campus,” I told her. “I regret that you were exposed in front of everyone. I do not regret wanting you somewhere safer.”
Her laugh came out soft and bitter. “Safer.”
“Yes.”
“You caused the danger.”
“I sped up a danger that was already there. He would’ve found you eventually, you have a growing social media presence.”
“You sound like a villain explaining himself in a lecture hall.”
“You submitted stolen research to get into my lab.” I retort.
Her face went very still.
“You took Katherine’s work because you wanted into a room you did not believe you could enter alone,” I said quietly. “I contacted your father because I wanted you into a room you refused to enter on your own. The comparison is closer than you want it to be.”
She pushed the bowl away. “I stole a proposal. You weaponized an abusive man.”
