Page 27 of To Have and To Hold
“No. I told you I was focusing on my training. I turned my phone off.”
Slade’s hands moved over Atticus, feeling the noticeable difference in his body. “You look good.”
“I feel good.” Atticus relaxed against him.
“Yes, you do,” Slade agreed, nuzzling his neck.
It was obvious Atticus was referring to mental as well as physical. There was definitely something different about him, and Slade found it extremely hot.
“Were you serious about the room?” Atticus asked.
He felt the subtle shift and realized that was Atticus’s way of moving on.
“Yes. It’s all set up. I can show you.” He pressed another kiss to Atticus’s shoulder, then eased off the couch and onto his feet. He grabbed his jeans and headed for the primary bathroom in case Atticus wanted to use the other one.
He cleaned up, then returned to find Atticus coming out of the bathroom, having done the same before getting dressed. He’d even put his shoes back on.
“You can go on back,” Slade told him as he grabbed his boots. “Just past the workout room.”
Doing his best not to hover, Slade took his time putting on his boots so Atticus could take the tour on his own. He was still sitting when Atticus returned a few minutes later.
“What do you think?”
“It’ll work. If it’s really okay with you.”
Slade held Atticus’s gaze because he sensed the man was going to add something.
He finally did. “I don’t want this to be weird, though.”
“What to be weird?”
Atticus’s gaze shifted to the window, and it was then Slade knew he was referring to Carson.
“You still want to see him,” Slade deduced, and that was definitely disappointment that filled him.
“I do, yes.”
Of course, he did. Slade wasn’t lucky enough that he could fall for a man who would only want him. Not that he hadn’t expected as much. Truth was, Slade wasn’t entirely over Carson either. He’d merely hoped that once Atticus returned, he’d be able to focus on something other than his past with a man who had treated him like shit.
Slade forced himself to his feet and went to find his shirt, which was on the floor by the door. “It’s cool. I figure you can pay me whatever you paid at the motel and half the utilities.”
He tugged on his shirt and turned around to find Atticus standing directly in front of him.
“I can’t explain what this is,” Atticus said. “But I’m willin’ to see where it goes if you are.”
“While you’ll be doin’ the same with Carson.”
Atticus swallowed, but he gave the man props for not looking away. “I owe it to myself to find out what I want.”
Slade hated every word in that sentence, but at the same time, he appreciated the honesty. In fact, he admired that Atticus could own up to it. He wasn’t trying to hide his confusion.
“You’re right,” Slade agreed, but he failed to sound like he meant it. “You do.”
“Maybe this isn’t such a good idea,” Atticus said, turning away.
Before he could get too far, Slade moved. He put his arms around Atticus from behind and hugged him.
“Yes, it is,” he said quickly. “I just … I want you here. Even if I can’t have all of you.”
