Page 93 of Heartache & Playdates
I heard a slight wheeze and saw her chest rising and falling. I shook her gently. “Nonna!”
Still nothing. I felt for a pulse on her wrist and there was one, but it was very faint.
I grabbed the landline that sat on her nightstand and dialed nine-one-one.
I explained to the operator that Nonna was breathing but not responsive. The woman stayed on the line with me, doing her best to keep me calm until I heard the sirens outside. I unlocked the front door and two fireman and two paramedics came inside. One didn’t even look old enough to drive, much less save a life and he looked like he should be a TikTok star or boy band member.
The first responders asked me questions about her age, medication, medical history, and how long she’d been unresponsive. My brain was more scrambled than a Denny’s omelet but I answered to the best of my knowledge.
A feeling of helplessness consumed me as I stood in the hall and watched as they worked on her. The firefighters were both called to another scene but the paramedics remained.
What would I do if she was gone?
This was my fault.
I shouldn’t have had that third, fourth, and fifth drink last night. I shouldn’t have gone out at all last night. I should have stayed home with Nonna. I should have been up this morning at a normal time and checked on her.
The knot in my throat grew larger as I watched them put her on the gurney.
“Is she okay?” I asked the boy band member. “Is she going to be okay?”
“We’re taking her to SFGH,” the older bearded paramedic responded.
It didn’t answer my question. I needed to know if she was okay.
“Do you want to ride along?” the boy band one offered.
“Yes.”
My back pressed against the wall as they wheeled her past me in the hall. There was an oxygen mask over her face and they had started an IV. Tears welled in my eyes as they took her outside. I pushed my feet into shoes, grabbed my purse and locked the door on my way out.
The bearded one drove and boy band rode in the back.
As we made our way through the city, I held her hand. I wasn’t sure if she could feel me or not, but if she could I wanted her to know I was there.
I wanted to ask boy band how old he was, but I wasn’t sure if that was insulting or not. “How long have you been doing this?”
“I’ve been an EMT for two years, but this is my first day at the station as a paramedic.”
“First day, wow. How’s it going so far?”
“This is my first call, so good.”
This call was good?I guess it could have been a lot worse. What if she hadn’t had a pulse? Or what if the call had been a house fire?
Perspective was everything.
I stared down at Nonna as we drove through the city. Once we got to the hospital and I knew what was going on I’d have to call or text my dad. Since he’d never responded to me when I told him that Nonna was hospitalized after falling and no one found her for two days, or when I told him I was moving in with her, I doubted he’d respond now.
But I’d still tell him. He was her only son. But not her only child.
When that thought occurred to me, I wondered if I’d be able to find her daughter. It was so long ago, and it was in Italy. I doubted that I’d be able to, but I knew two people who would.
39
MADDOX
The lightsin the city looked brighter, the air smelled fresher, even the streets looked cleaner as I drove Lina back to her apartment. It was like the world was somehow shinier tonight.
