Page 2 of Bad Influence
The Captain stands and rounds his desk to shake Beckett’s hand. The two men lower their voices as they talk.
“Caroline, let’s go.”
Conversation over, Beckett turns to me and sets a hand on my back. I stiffen, walking faster to get away from the feel of hishand on my body. His hand which was gripping his assistant’s thigh as he told her he was going to fuck her harder than anyone else ever has and she felt so fucking perfect.
I’m suddenly grateful we’ve never had sex. Beckett never initiated and neither did I. I assumed he was just being respectful of my parents and their conservative thinking.
The muggy early evening sticks to my skin when we walk out of the station and Beckett rushes us to his car.
The only reason I continue to walk next to him is because it’s ingrained in me not to react. Appearances must be maintained at all costs. I can be on death’s door and I’ll still be expected to keep a straight face.
There’s a donut pillow on the driver’s seat and the sight of it sends a strange thrill through me.
Beckett winces as he sits down and slams the door shut. I’m surprised the hospital discharged him this quickly. He turns to me, brown eyes blazing.
“I had to gettwentystitches. My ass is numb, our families are losing their minds, and we have the gala tonight.”
I blink at him once, tilting my head. The apology is at the tip of my tongue, burning up my throat. I don’t let it out. “Do you expect me to apologize?”
Closing his eyes, Beckett sighs deeply. He presses the start button and the car gently roars to life.
“I don’t expect you to apologize. I didn’t tell you about Emily, and that was my mistake.”
How does he sound so normal?
“You think telling me about Emily would have made this better?” I ask.
He glances at me as he pulls out of the parking lot.
“Come on, Caroline, you know how this works,” he says, like I should know better.
“Actually, I don’t. Because I thought we were getting married.”
I never expected love from Beckett, but I thought I’d at leastget some respect. This is my fault for trying to be perfect for my family. Trying so hard to fit what they want me to be. I went to law school, which I enjoyed, and I allowed Beckett to woo me and when he asked me to get married, just like our families expected, I said yes, just like our families expected.
“We are getting married. This doesn’t change anything,” Beckett says.
“Excuse me?” I’m so confused. “You were fucking your assistant in your office this morning. I think that puts a wrinkle in our wedding plans.”
Beckett actually laughs, which infuriates me. There’s a condescending tinge to it, like he can’t believe I’m this stupid.
“Our parents are never going to let you cancel the wedding, Caroline. I know you will never go against them. If you actually think about it, you’ll realize I did this for you.”
We’re stopped at a red light and for one blinding second, I actually consider unlatching my seatbelt and walking into traffic to get away from him. But where will I go? I’ve never lived anywhere other than my parents home, slowly drowning under the weight of their expectations. Being engaged to Beckett has eased that burden because in their mind, I’m no longer their responsibility.
“You cheated on me as a favor to me?” I ask through cold lips.
Beckett sighs, pulling the car through the front gates of my house and onto the winding driveway. He parks it and turns to look at me. Sometimes when he looks at me, I wish it was blue eyes staring back at me instead of brown ones.
Reaching out a hand, he brushes my hair back over my shoulder.
“There are some things a man doesn’t do with his wife, Caroline,” he says, tone condescending. “You’re so beautiful and delicate. I don’t want to hurt you. It doesn’t mean I want you any less. You’re going to be the perfect wife and being a goodhusband means I have to protect you from the animalistic nature of sex.”
I never realized it’s possible for someone to say so many wrong things all at once. I never knew it’ll be possible for my brain to completely run out of my words.
Unable to think of anything in reply, I simply get out of the car and walk into the house.
CHAPTER 2
