Page 28 of Equilibrium
Tonight, I would allow him to see me, the real me. The one no one else had seen for years. Tonight, I wouldn’t be paralyzed. And maybe, just maybe, we could do this again.
This game, where he got to see me, and I could be me.
Then I could go back to pretending. I could go back to yet another day and live through it. Just exist.
“Storm,” I begged, my voice tiny. “Please. Please touch me.”
Please make me forget. Make me forget everything. Just tonight. Just for one night, I want to be free. I want to feel like me. I want to feel normal.
Just a girl and a guy she likes. Just a girl getting what she wants without any consequences. I was tired of pretending. Tired of being strong. I wanted to break. Just for one night, I wanted him to take it all away. I wanted to feel good. Elated, fulfilled.
“I-I just,” I stuttered. “I want to feel good. I want to feel good even if it’s only for one night. Please, make me feel good.”
His nostrils expanded as he took a hold of my head, his nose touching mine. The smell of alcohol, our sweat, and the intoxicating scent of leather was pulling me under. It was all Storm.
“This isn’t only for tonight.” He kissed my forehead, lingering there for a second. “This is for forever.”
My heart almost jumped out of my chest. If only that were possible. If only he could have me forever. If only I could hold him forever, two of us, like this. A perfect picture. But I was betrayed once before by the person that promised me his forever. Who’s to say that Storm wouldn’t do the same?
I wanted to hold on to him, to his words, to cling to his touch, but I couldn’t. I didn’t trust him. He knew how to pack those pretty little words and call me his, but the moment I wasn’t looking, some other girl had her hands all over him. Call me childish or insecure, but I wasn’t going to go through the same pain again.
I didn’t want to correct him, but the filthy claws of reality were slowly scratching against my skin. I shook them off and welcomed back the illusion we were creating.
One tiny little lie, one night, and then I could get away and forget about him.
He took the shirt I wore, lifting it up over my chest, and I lifted my arms, letting him undress me. Letting him take care of me. I was strong, but I wanted to fall apart.
I wanted to have somebody there waiting for me. Someone to catch me. Someone to save me from myself, even if I didn’t want to believe that it was possible.
I was already dripping, my pussy clenching involuntarily. I needed to feel him inside.
“Naked,” I said as soon as he dropped my shirt. “Now, Storm.”
He smiled, the sweet smile I didn’t deserve, but I could pretend that I did. He took a hold of the hem of his shirt and pulled it over his head, exposing his chest to me. The tattoo of a skull glared at me, taking over his whole torso. Little piercing buds on his nipples were gleaming under the light, and before he could do anything else, I lowered my head, flicking my tongue over the left one.
“Fuck,” he groaned, fisting my hair. I pulled the cold metal between my teeth, feeling the rumble in his chest. A heady feeling of power came over me, and I repeated the same over the right one.
Like a blur of events, his pants were on the floor, and he was kneeling in front of me, spreading my legs. My back hit the wall with a thud, and as he latched onto my bare pussy, I entangled my hands in his hair, pulling at the dark strands.
“Holy shit!” I screamed when he latched onto my clit and lifted my legs onto his shoulders. The little hum came from him as he feasted on me was heaven sent. My legs started shaking as he moved from my clit to my opening, and before I could gather my wits, a finger entered me, and then a second one, while his tongue circled around that bundle of nerves.
“Storm!” I shook on top of him, afraid I would fall. “Storm, I can’t... Oh my fucking God! I’m going to—” A third finger joined the other two, stretching me, pain and pleasure mixing in one. “Holy fucking shit!”
He fucked me with his fingers, latching onto my clit with his mouth, holding me with his other hand.
“I can’t,” I started shaking my head. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, holy mother of Jesus!”
It was like an avalanche, spreading from my lower tummy, going higher and higher, until the dam broke down, almost knocking me to the floor. I felt like I was floating in the air.
The sweetest oblivion, the escape, nothing else was on my mind. I could see nothing, feel nothing but him between my legs.
He didn’t give me time to recover before he stood up, lifting me at the same time. His lips connected with mine, the taste of me mixed with the heady scent of him. I was drowning, falling, and I didn’t want to stop.
I didn’t want him to stop.
He took a step back, stroking his dick, and when I dropped my eyes, the piercings on his nipples weren’t the only ones catching light and making my heart beat faster.
Holy fuck.
