Page 130 of Shamed
She’s not in the living room or kitchen, so I move straight to the bathroom, where I see the light on, that bad feeling growing like icy tendrils up my spine.
My steps are hurried, but I come to an abrupt halt when I step into the bathroom and take in the gruesome scene in front of me.
No.
Fuck no.
“Jayne!” The organ in my chest jumps straight into my throat while the rest of my body drops to the floor beside her lifeless body.
Agonizing fear shoots through me, the world collapsing on top of me in a devastating heap.
Panic feels like a living, breathing thing inside me that shakes me to the core.
Blood, there’s too much of it. And she’s pale, too fucking pale.
But then I see her chest rise and eyelids flutter.
She’s still alive, still awake, but her half-lidded gray eyes are vacant of life. Empty.
“Jesus,” I croak, grabbing her wrist with one hand and holding it in a vice grip, while I palm her pale face with my other trembling hand. “Jayne, baby, what did you do?”
We were just talking this morning, just fighting half an hour ago; she’s in the same light pink sweater she wore earlier. How can she be the same person slumped on the bathroom floor, her sleeve pulled up and blood leaking out?
“You need to stay with me, okay? I don’t want you gone. I’m so sorry. Fuck. I’m so sorry.”
I don’t know all the right things to say to keep her here.
“Did you hear me?”
This is my fault.
Quickly retrieving my phone, I dial nine-one-one and ramble panicked responses to the woman on the other end of the line.
Tears sting the backs of my eyes, and I can see her cheeks are still wet. She was crying.Alone.
Just stay with me.
I use my shoulder to wipe the moisture from my cheek.
Heartbeats pound in my ears, and my lungs feel like they’re closing in on themselves.
Without letting go of her wrist, I reach for a drawer in her vanity, rifling through each one until I find a bandage.
“Stay with me, Jayne.”
After wrapping it tightly around her wrist, I palm her cheeks, smudging blood across her skin, then press my forehead to hers.
I’ve never felt so fucking helpless in my life.
“Please don’t leave me.”
Please, please don’t fucking leave me.
CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX
Mase
It’s funny how almost losing someone the way I did tonight is the quickest way to wipe the slate clean of any grievances. Suddenly, whatever they did wrong doesn’t seem to matter.
