Page 89 of Shamed
“Absolutely.”
I hear her soft sigh, her fingers remaining still out of the corner of my eye. “Okay.”
Despite knowing I’m supposed to be creating space, and despite the warning in my head to leave her the fuck alone, I still find myself turning to her at the next red light. “Do you want to come to the gym with me today, then go to work from there?”
A small smile turns her lips up as she faces me, her eyes giving off a blueish hue today. “Yeah. I think I might do that.”
I return her smile, then face forward again once the light turns green.
Coming to a couple of my classes and having a few workout sessions has done wonders for her. I can’t explain how much better it makes me feel knowing she’s gaining strength and is now better equipped to protect herself at work.
Work, where she dances, almost naked, in front of other people . . .
Well, that’s one way to put a damper on my mood.
Realizing I’m strangling the steering wheel, I shake my head internally and loosen my grip, relaxing my shoulders. “We can focus on legs today.”
Before Jayne can reply, my phone chimes with my mom’s ringtone.
Sitting a little straighter, I answer the call, putting it on speaker. Mom hardly ever calls me, so of course, my mind goes to the worst-case scenario.
“Mom?”
“Hi, honey.” Her voice sounds as calm and gentle as ever, not distraught or urgent. “I hope I’m not interrupting anything.”
“Not at all, what’s wrong?”
“Oh, nothing’s wrong. It’s just that I went to watch a movie and realized I’ve been signed out of both Netflix and Disney.”
I huff out a breath, relaxing back in my seat while my lips twitch. I swear I hear an amused sound from Jayne as well.
At least it’s not an emergency.
“I can come by and sign you in again.”
There isn’t much she can do anymore, so she relies heavily on movies for entertainment when she’s in her room.
“Only when you’re not busy.”
I peek over at Jayne, but her eyes are fixed ahead. “I can stop by on the way to work today.”
“Only if it’s convenient. Thank you, sweetheart. What would I do without you?” That familiar ache pokes at me, but before it can spread, Mom speaks again, causing my brows to draw together instead. “Heidi will be here, by the way. Maybe you two could talk a little?”
“Mom.” My eyes flicker to Jayne again, but now she’s looking out the window. This is not the type of conversation I want to have in front of her.
“I’m just saying,” Mom says softly. “There could be something there.”
I almost laugh. There willneverbe anything there, but I don’t say that. “I have to go, Mom. I’ll see you later.”
“See you later.”
We come to another set of lights, and I look back at Jayne. Her gaze is still locked out the window, and I have the urge to explain myself to her, explain that it’s not what it sounds like. But she’d probably wonder why I was telling her. We’re not a couple, and the only reason Jayne is even in my car, in my apartment, in my life, is because I forced her to be.
I obviously haven’t told Mom about her yet.
I don’t know why.
Actually, that’s a lie. Idoknow why.
