Page 100 of How (Not) to Conjure a Boyfriend
“Yeah.” I manage a grin.
“There we go!” Kaitlynn says, and throws an arm around my shoulders and drags me through the parking lot.
My first step doesn’t go so well. My shoe snags on the ledge of the pathway and I almost end up facedown on the concrete. Almost. Thankfully Kaitlynn tightens her grip just before the momentum can drag us both down. And then, just as my spirits are finally a tiny fraction bit better, I see Julieta running across the lot in our direction. I do my best not to sigh as she walks up.
“Hey! Y’all coming tonight?” she asks.
“Coming to…” Kaitlynn answers exactly like I’m thinking.
What’s happening tonight? Not like it matters. Once I get home I’m going exactly nowhere except my bed, where I’m going to stay until morning. And who knows, I might even stay after that.
“The bonfire. At Daniel’s farm! Everyone’s going!” Julieta gushes. Guess I’m not everyone then. “Kadin’s coming! Oh, Kenzie! You could bring Hayden.”
“Maybe…” I grumble.
I see the news hasn’t spread. I’m sort of hoping it doesn’t and people just forget. I don’t want more questions.
“We’ll think about it,” Kaitlynn jumps in. Her eyes sweeping from me back to Julieta. “Just send me the address.”
“Will do!” Julieta gives the thumbs-up and races away, disappearing into another group of our classmates.
“Not thinking about it,” I mumble to Kaitlynn, and start back down the path to my car. Not in a million years. And obviously Hayden wouldn’t be coming with us if we did go, and the person I’d want to take surely hates me now. The thought makes me even sadder. Getting to ride with Zachary up to Daniel’s farm and sit cuddled by a fire, almost like that night in the woods…
I huff and try to erase the stupid idea from my head. It’s pointless, even if I was hoping he’d text me last night when I got home, which was also pointless. He never did. I don’t know what possessed me to hope he would. It’s outrageous to think Zachary would even consider speaking to me ever again.
“We obviously don’t have to go, Kenzie,” Kaitlynn says, but a thought blossoms behind my dull eyes.
“Bonfire means alcohol, right?” I ask.
“Uh…maybe,” Kaitlynn says. “Why?”
I don’t say anything. I’ve never had a drink, but why should that stop me?
* * *
The sky is so clear tonight. No clouds, just a dusting of little diamonds obscured only by the massive twenty-foot flames shooting skyward from a mess of logs and branches. Even from Kaitlynn’s car its heat reaches my skin. It’s just a touch, but it’s welcome in this winter chill. And it smells so good. That scentof burning pine needles, which thankfully overpowers the area’s other competing scent: a light skunky stink that can only mean one thing. I guess I should have expected that.
“You sure about this?” Kaitlynn asks.
“Yes,” I say, then shiver. “Ineedthis.”
“Do you though?” she asks.
This isn’t my usual scene, or hers. It’s too big and loud. I’d prefer a few friends around a little fire, a movie night, maybe a group at Hammy’s. Not half of Mount Laurel’s student body screaming and making out around a massive campfire that could consume half the mountain if it hadn’t rained recently. And the sight of people I don’t know isn’t making it any better. That means other schools! Oh shit! Mitchell High? Hayden or Zachary might show up! No! I hadn’t prepared for that possibility. What would I say if they did come? Or would I just avoid them? What if people think we’re still dating and we have to break the news?
“About to find out.” I shrug like I’m not freaking out inside. “At least we’re not home.”
“Sure.” Kaitlynn doesn’t sound so confident.
“Let’s go,” I groan, and start toward the fire. “Remember the signal if you see them.”
It’s simple. The signal is to repeatedly sayrunwhile pushing the other in the opposite direction and eventually to the car. It was Kaitylnn’s idea. She didn’t think she’d catch anything more subtle quickly enough.
“Got it,” she says.
There are so many people. A lot of the faces are familiar, if only vaguely, but most of them don’t know me, or they didn’t before everyone heard I was “dating” Hayden. Which hopefullymeans they only know my name and couldn’t match my face to it. I’d really like to avoid talking to anyone but Kaitlynn, maybe Julieta, or Landon if he shows up, but that’s it. And I really don’t want to talk to anyone who just wants to ask about Hayden.
All things considered, as much as being here is so not like me and I currently hate it, tonight’s goal is simple. Avoid people, bask in the fire, and find some alcohol. There has to be some; this is Daniel’s bonfire. The only reason he hasn’t been suspended for selling weed at school is because he’s on the starting lineup of the school football team. Everyone knows he’s where you go for gas. Surely, that means there will be alcohol too.
