Page 232 of The Path to Loving Him
I’m not my father.
He was a selfish man. A disgraceful man. An addict. An abuser. He didn’t know what love was and had no intention of ever showing any of us what love could be.
I am a selfless man.
I’m a man of honor.
I’m a gentle, understanding man.
I’m a protector.
And I’m a man who can love. Who has love to give and love to receive.
That will never change.
Therefore, I’m nothing like him, and I keep repeating that in my head, over and over again, forcing myself to believe it.
“Come on,” Gabby says. “She’s waiting in there.”
I nod, then unbuckle my seat belt. We get out of the truck, and I meet her at the front. I take her hand in mine, leaning into her for the support that I need to get through this.
We make our way up the porch stairs, and I lead the way into the house where I find Aubree in the kitchen cleaning up breakfast. She glances over her shoulder and turns off the faucet when she sees that it’s me.
“Hey.” She walks up to me and pulls me into a hug. “You okay?”
I nod. “Yeah.”
“You sure?”
“I’m good, Aubree.” I offer her a smile, and that’s all that needs to be said.
She gets it.
She’s been there.
We’ve all had our breakdowns in this family. What matters is that we keep rising from those breakdowns, and we keep coming back to each other. We keep leaning on each other.
Aubree looks at Gabby and asks, “Are you okay?”
Gabby smiles and nods. “I’m good. How’s Mac?”
“She’s upstairs with Wyatt, most likely playing horsey.”
“How was she last night?” I ask.
“She was okay. We watched a movie and had some ice cream. She asked about you last night.”
“She did?” I ask, hope blooming in my chest. “What did she say?”
“She asked if you were okay. If you were alone, because she didn’t want you to be alone. I told her that Gabby was with you.”
I don’t know why, but that chokes me up.
That little girl.
So fucking sweet. And after everything she’s been through, she can sit there, in her feels, and worry about me being alone.
I love her. I love that little girl so damn much.
