Page 80 of Bridesmaid for Hire
“Perfect,” Haisley says. “Our tour guide is meeting us out front around ten-thirty. Lunch will be provided. He said to make sure to wear socks and shoes. They have quite a few snakes on the trail right now so, no open-toed shoes or anything like that.” I feel my entire face go white.
Because…snakes?
“Sounds great,” Maggie says. “We’ll see you then.”
Jude and Haisley clasp their hands together and take off toward a table that’s off to the right.
“We’re not going,” I say, setting my cloth napkin on the table. I’ve lost my appetite, thank you very much.
“What do you mean we’re not going?” she asks as she cuts into her pancakes. “You just told them we’d see them at ten-thirty.”
“Uh yeah, before the mention of snakes.”
She pauses with her fork halfway to her mouth and stares at me. “You can’t be serious.”
“Dead fucking serious,” I say. “I don’t do snakes, and I’m not about to go hike in the wilderness where I could be bitten.”
“Don’t you know the odds of that happening are slim to none?”
“Yeah, but there’s still a chance. Which is too high of a chance for me. Not happening.”
“You’re being ridiculous. This is the perfect opportunity to grow that relationship with the Hoppers. And what are you going to say? You can’t go because you’re afraid a snake might bite you? If you were ashamed of throwing up in front of them, bowing out of a hike because you’re afraid a snake might bite you is way worse.”
I lean forward and whisper, “You’re telling me you’re going to go risk your life just to be on a business mogul’s good side?”
“Risk my life?” She rolls her eyes dramatically. “Oh my God, Brody. Are you hearing yourself?”
“Yes, I am.” I jab the table in front of me. “Mark my words, I will not be going on that hike. No way. No how.”
“Do you have your water?” Maggie asks as she stands next to me in another pair of tiny spandex shorts and a matching sports bra.
I clench my water bottle to my chest as I stare at the dirt path in front of me. “Yes.”
“Hey,” Maggie quietly says. “Why don’t you look a little more terrified? I don’t think you’re getting the point across.”
“I’m going to need you not to talk to me anymore.”
She loops her arm through mine. “Sorry, but remember, we’re supposed to be madly in love.”
The only thing that’s stronger than our fake love right now is my waning confidence.
After breakfast, we went back to the bungalow where Maggie ranted for half an hour about how I need to grow up and stop being a baby, and even threatened to storm right up to the Hopper family and tell them that I’m not worth their time because I was too afraid of snakebites. It went on and on and on until I stood up from where I was lying on the bed and shouted I would go.
It was all very dramatic.
And because it was so dramatic, I was too proud to back down, even though right about now, I wish I had about zero pride. Because as I stare down the dark, dank path that leads to the island’s snake den—an overexaggeration, I’ll admit—I wish I was back at the bungalow in the comfort of the bed where I could hoist the covers up to my eyes and swear all images of snakes away from me.
Yes…I know I’m acting like a baby, but it’s my one fear.
My one phobia.
I never, ever want to see a snake in real life, especially out in nature where they like to camouflage themselves in the depths of the jungle, ready to strike when the time is right. This is what I think…we as humans should just leave them their territory and we can stay within the safety of our homes. That way they’re happy and I’m happy and no one is biting anyone.
“Ooh, I’m so excited,” Haisley says as she walks by us, Jude following closely behind, holding her hand.
One thing that I’ve noticed about Jude is how attached he is to Haisley. He’s possessive but not in a brutish way. He lets everyone know that Haisley is his and protects her at all costs. He’s a presence near her, carrying a “don’t fuck with her or me” attitude that can only stem from someone who has been through something in life.
The twins follow behind—their outfits matching Haisley’s—asking her questions about some sort of tossing sticks. Not quite sure what that is about, but I’m not going to worry about it because I have one job, andone job alone: to keep my eyes trained on the ground and focused on the trail. There will be no snakes crossing paths with me.
