Page 104 of Bourbon Sins
“Jett—”
“Leave!” he roared, as he spun around and looked down at me with such malice that I had to choke back a cry. “Fucking leave! Just fucking leave already.”
I backed away while he spat venom at me with the harshness of his words and the hurtful look in his eyes.
His head and voice lowered at the same time as he spoke out. “Please leave, Goldie.”
The dejection in his voice made me stay. Why, I had no clue. I should be running for Bourbon Street right now, but the man commanded my attention and had an overwhelming sense of power over me that made me reach out to him.
I cupped his face and whispered, “Do you really want me to leave?”
His sad eyes looked down at me and for a brief moment, my heart flipped in my stomach as I saw him saying no, but his words contradicted my thoughts.
“Yes,” he answered and walked away from me. “I’ll have Kace give you a ride and your money will be transferred over to your account. You are free to go, Goldie.”
The fact that he kept calling me Goldie and not little one was not lost on me. He was dismissing me; he was done with me. Instead of putting up a fight, begging him to tell me why I was picked, why I was here in the club, I sucked up my pride and turned away from him, the one man who’d ever really held any kind of power over me, a power that was so strong I felt like I was losing myself as I walked farther and farther away from him.
Chapter Forty-Two
“I Am”
JETT
The door to my office closed and I waited a few seconds before I crumpled to the floor and rested my head in my hands. The look in Goldie’s eyes when I told her to leave burned a vacant hole into my soul and twisted my gut. There wasn’t a bone in my body that wanted Goldie to leave, but I was hurt and I wanted to hurt her. Fucking pride.
Kace came up to my office an hour before Goldie came up and confirmed that she was, in fact, at Café du Monde in the French Quarter, talking with Rex. There was only one thing she would be doing there and that would be considering leaving me for Rex.
I wanted to punch a hole through the wall from the news. I wanted to march down to that café, grab Goldie, and claim her as mine, but I knew that was probably the worst idea I’d ever had because, not only would that be going against everything I believed in, but it would also give the fodder Rex wanted to take me down. I needed to make it seem like I didn’t care if he took Goldie, just like he took Natasha, even though it was eating me up inside.
Why did she have such an effect on me? I reached up to my desk and grabbed my bottle of bourbon. I took a long swig and sagged a little lower on the floor as my head rested against the wood of my desk.
I technically shouldn’t care. I needed to distance myself from her; she was getting too close to me. It wasn’t her fault, though, it was mine. I was the fucking moron who decided to take her out on a date, I was the idiot who kissed her, who opened my goddamn heart to her. I shook my head as I realized my downfall. Before the date, I was able to have a tight hold on the way she made me feel. Yes, there were moments where I saw her starting to break down my façade, but I was able to rein everything back in. After the date, I lost myself completely and saw the nineteen-year-old come back. The naïve nineteen-year-old who thought all women were amazing, sensitive creatures that would never hurt me, because even though my mom was not that much a part of my life, she still loved me. I put all my faith in women and then Natasha tore that faith away with her conniving personality and ability to break someone in half without a second thought.
I was a pathetic fucking sack as I sagged on my floor and drank the only thing that would remove the feelings clamping my heart. Fucking feelings. I didn’t do fucking feelings. I was a stoic bastard who took what I wanted, when I wanted it. I didn’t sit around acting all pussy-whipped and drinking over a girl I barely knew.
The thing that really bothered me was I felt like I knew more about her than anyone. I had a strong pull gravitating me toward her the moment I saw her drawing my mom’s grave. I wasn’t lying when I said I thought my mom brought us together, but why she did, I had no clue. I often talked to her like Goldie talked to her parents, and I told her I didn’t need anyone, that I was happier than when I was with Natasha, so why my mom thought it was necessary to bring a bold-mouthed, sassy, honey-haired girl into my life was beyond me.
Fuck. I ran my hands down my face, trying to free my mind of the image of Goldie I’d just conjured. She really was so sassy, so incredibly soft and her eyes, fuck, they spoke a million words when you looked at them. She was audacious; funny . . . God was she funny and sexier than any other woman I had seen naked. The only thing wrong with her was she wanted something I couldn’t give her, that I wouldn’t give her: a relationship. It was written all over her face.
The door to my office crashed open as Kace stood in the doorway with his chest heaving. The minute his eyes connected with mine, I realized that he was about to kill and I was his prey. Fuck.
He charged in my direction and grabbed me with both hands by my open shirt and tossed me on my desk.
Here we go again.
“What the fuck are you thinking? You’re just going to let her go?”
A maniacal laugh came out of my mouth as I took another sip from my glass bottle. “This coming from the person who didn’t want her here in the first place.”
Kace ripped the bottle out of my hands and threw it against the wall, making a loud crash and a wet mess. My wall had been taking a beating lately. Golden liquid slid down my wall as anger raged through my body. Not even knowing what I was doing, my body slammed into Kace’s and took him down to the floor. We scrambled on the ground and threw cheap shots at each other. I was pretty drunk if I was fighting with an ex-professional boxer who had the ability to kill a man, but I didn’t care. It felt good; the blows Kace was giving me took away the other pain in my heart.
We rolled on the floor and I wound up on top of Kace, giving me the chance to throw a punch to his jaw, which he wasn’t able to block. The crunch of my fist to his jaw was a welcome sensation. Kace’s face barely flinched and his fist made contact with my face shortly after. My head flew back, giving Kace the opportunity to struggle free. He stood and hovered over me as I looked up at him, pressing my palm against my now-bloody mouth.
“You feel better, dickhead? Is your rich, pitiful ass trying to prove something? That you’re a match for me? Keep wishing; I could destroy you if I wanted to.”
I stood up and got right in Kace’s face as I said, “It’s funny how fast you can forget that I hold the keys to your future. If anyone can destroy someone in this room, it’s me. So watch your fucking mouth.”
“What’s this really about, Jett? You really going to let Goldie run off to Rex? Just like Natasha?”
