Page 40 of Silver Edge
I tried to follow his words, but it didn’t make sense. “You want to have sex with me a lot, but you won’t?”
“Right.”
“I thought women were supposed to be the complicated ones.” I sighed.
Drake put the car in gear. “Let’s get back to the club. It’s getting late. I’ll try to explain myself better along the way.” He maneuvered the car back up the interstate. “You mentioned something today and I want to know if you’re willing to try it with me.”
“Sexual?” I asked.
Drake laughed. “Intimate, yes. Sexual, no. You know how you mentioned your mother did something called cuddle therapy?”
“Yes,” I answered, ignoring the nervous twitch in my leg.
“How did she do that?”
I clutched my knee to try to still the uncontrollable shaking in my leg. “She just held me all night. Why?”
Drake took a long breath, his chest rising and falling. “I have a theory, so I want to try something.”
“Like a hypothesis?” I finally stretched my leg out to make it stop bouncing.
“Yes, like a hypothesis. You’re so tense when I first touch you, and I don’t want to make you uncomfortable. I know you’ve had sex for what you consider to be some sort of chemical release, and that you’ve never been with a guy that’s taken his time for you to get familiar with his touch. To get used to holding you before he moved to other areas of your body, right?”
I shrugged, pulling my hoodie sleeves over my hands. “No, like I told you before, the only sex I’ve had, when I wasn’t high, was quick and over.”
His face tightened, in that stressed way again. What was I saying that was making him upset? “Is that wrong?”
He lowered his hand to the center console, palm up and I thought for a second then took it.
“See? You can respond.” Drake changed lanes then glanced at me before he continued. “I want you to know what it’s like to be with someone who takes your needs into consideration. I’ve never been a selfish lover, but more for the sake of saving face when girls gossip. I cared more about wanting to maintain my reputation. I know it’s sad. Don’t ever repeat that. I’ll deny it even if you do.”
I loosened the seat belt and angled my body so I could watch him drive instead of the bright lights and sounds outside that were distracting me. This conversation seemed too important not to focus. “Why would I tell someone?”
“You wouldn’t, would you?” Drake took my hand and pressed a kiss to it. “Is that okay? Are you comfortable with me kissing your hand?”
My concentration wavered to the brush of sensation he’d left behind. “As long as you don’t want my full attention on the conversation, I don’t mind. I like it.”
“Okay, good to know. I want to propose something, but if it’ll make you uncomfortable, or if you’re not ready, I totally understand.”
“What’s that?” I asked.
“Spend the night with me tonight.”
Chapter Seventeen
Drake took the exit ramp off the interstate and stopped at the light. “Okay, you’ve been silent for almost an hour after I had to practically beg for a reply. If this isn’t all right with you, it’s okay. I’ll just grab my sleeping bag and park it on your floor again.”
The question had hung on my tongue the entire time, but something held me back. “You know I can take care of myself. You don’t have to spend the night with me, or sleep on my floor. I’ve been able to handle things on my own for a long time.”
“Scarlet, I’m not asking you to give up your independence, but have you ever thought that I might want to take care of you? Not control you in any way, not that I could if I tried, but just be there for you. You staying alone in a dark warehouse in a bad section of town isn’t something I can sleep at night knowing. I care about you. When you care about someone, you want to make sure the other person is taken care of. You want them to be happy.”
The light changed and the car rolled forward then took a sharp left to cross over the interstate.
“I don’t know how to handle someone caring about me,” I muttered. “I’m scared I’ll screw it up. That I won’t give you what you need because I don’t know what that is. Or what if I freak out and punch your lights out because you touched me wrong?”
He maneuvered the car over the broken curb and parked near the rear entrance to Bands. “Didn’t you just meet my grandmother even though you didn’t want to?”
He was right. I didn’t want to face meeting his grandmother, but I did. “I’m glad I met her. She’s amazing.”
