Page 40 of Eleanor & Grey
She didn’t listen, though. She climbed into bed with me and wrapped her arms around me. That made me cry even more because she was in pain and hurting yet still wanted to comfort me. It blew my mind how a mother could be the strongest person in a room, even at her weakest.
* * *
We moved the third week of November, after my parents figured out all the details for me transferring to a new school. Dad booked first-class tickets to Florida, even though Momsaid it wasn’t worth it. It was as if Dad felt helpless, so he was doing anything he could to try to make Mom a little more comfortable.
I was able to sit next to her on the flight, and the whole time I held her hand. She fell asleep pretty easily, and I was happy about that. Every time she’d awaken, she looked for my hand, and it was still in hers.
“Still here, Mom,” I’d whisper as she went back to sleep.
I’m still here.
13Greyson
FROM: [email protected]
DATE: November23, 4:54 PM
SUBJECT: Timing
Ellie,
You’ve been gone for a week, and it feels so weird without you here.
I’m a jerk, and I handled things really badly. I’m sorry. In my head, I just thought we could at least try to make it work. I haven’t felt like this about anyone before, and I just hate that you’re gone. I didn’t know caring about someone could happen so fast, and I’m just not sure I know how to shut off the caring. My life has been lonely for a while now. I thought lonely was the default option, thought being lonely was normal. Even though I’ve always been surrounded by people, it’s as if no one really knew me. And then came you.
I didn’t mean to storm off and slam my door like that.
Sometimes my head just gets so clouded I’m not sure how to handle my own thoughts.
I’m really going to miss you, and I’m not used to feeling this way.
I know that’s selfish, and I know you’re going through so muchworse, and I know it’s stupid for me to even be this sad about it when your life just flipped upside down, but it hurts.
Hopefully you can forgive me and we can be friends.
Grey
* * *
FROM: [email protected]
DATE: November24, 8:00 AM
SUBJECT: Re: Timing
Grey,
You’d have to be crazy to think I wouldn’t still want to be your friend.
Ellie
* * *
FROM: [email protected]
