Page 37 of Consequences of Their Wedding Charade
‘I’m not prepared to be a part-time parent,’ he told her.
‘What do you mean?’
‘I mean I’ll do whatever it takes to ensure a child of mine gets the very best that life has to offer, and that includes a full-time father.’
This was the steel hand in the velvet glove, Jess thought numbly. A guy didn’t climb the greasy pole to get to the very top by being Mr Nice Guy. He might be fair and generous and witty, and often surprisingly thoughtful, but he could also be tough when he needed to be. Now, it seemed, was one of those times.
‘Are youthreateningme, Curtis?’
‘I’m asking you to think long and hard about my proposition and to put yourself at the back of the queue, as I am prepared to do. A child needs two parents whenever possible, Jess. That’s something I would fight tooth and nail to achieve. It’s more important than any other consideration.’
CHAPTER EIGHT
‘TOMORROW...’HESAID, vaulting upright. ‘We can talk tomorrow. You tell me that I need to go away and think about what you’ve lobbed into my life? Well,youneed to have some time to think about the only solution I would find acceptable in this situation. I’m going to head to William’s, and I intend to stay there until we’ve come to an agreement on this.’
‘No!’ Jess sprang to her feet and, rather as he had earlier, she swerved round him to bar his exit. Hands on her hips and feet squarely planted on the ground, she glared at him.
‘Come again?’
‘No way, Curtis Hamilton, do you get to tell me that you’re prepared to fight me over this because you happen to believe in “the sanctity of family life”! One minute you’re waxing lyrical that relationships are a waste of time, and then in the next breath you’re telling me that we need to get married for the sake of a baby!’
He flushed and raked his fingers through his hair. ‘Relationshipsaren’t a waste of time,’ he muttered. ‘Loveis the pointless component.’
‘So you’re prepared to walk down the aisle with a woman even though you don’t love her.’
‘If there is a child involved, then yes. I am.’
‘Why, Curtis?’ There was genuine curiosity in her voice. This guy was the epitome of a forward-thinking male, one who was tuned in to women in the workplace, who made sure that there was no discrimination between the sexes when it came to pay and promotions. Three years previously, Jess could remember reading an article about his massive company being a leading light in the war against all forms of discrimination.
So how was it that he could be so stubbornlytraditionalwhen it came to something like this?
It wasn’t even as though she wanted to bar access to his child. She was prepared to bend over backwards to accommodate him!
‘I...’ He stared at her, at her puzzled expression. ‘I wouldn’t mind a coffee,’ he muttered, shifting uncomfortably under her direct gaze.
‘Okay.’ She stepped aside.
The atmosphere had shifted, and she couldn’t really even work outhow, but it had. Her heart began to race. There was a peculiar vulnerability she couldn’tseebut could somehowsense.
She walked ahead of him to the kitchen and felt his eyes on her as she bustled about making them both a mug of coffee. She didn’t have to ask how he took his because she knew. No milk and a heaped teaspoon of sugar. She’d teased him often enough that sugar in coffee was unnecessary.
‘You have to see it from my point of view, Curtis,’ she told him quietly, positioning herself opposite him at the small table and cradling the warm mug between her hands before taking a sip. ‘I just don’t get it. I don’t want to fight you on this. Not at all. And from where I’m sitting, any child we have will have us both. We just won’t be living together. We won’t be sacrificing our chance to find true love and happiness with someone else because the unexpected has happened. You should berelievedthat I’m not trying to force your hand!’
‘I... Before William rescued me...’ Curtis stared into the depths of the abyss and took the plunge. Confession. He’d never considered it good for the soul. His past was his and his alone but now he felt an unexpected rush of relief that he was going to do what he had never been tempted to do in his life before. Share. ‘Before William rescued me... I was in care.’ His eyes met hers. He was already resenting any show of pity but there was none in her clear gaze. She simply tilted her head to one side, her expression urging him to continue. He found that that was something he wanted to do.
‘I have no idea who my father is. He’d fled the scene, presumably, before I was born. Maybe he took flight at the prospect of an unwanted kid. At any rate, my mother...my mother was clever and beautiful. She was also a drug addict, something she got into when she left university. William knew her when she was a student. He was her tutor and he took a paternal interest in her because she was, I expect, something of a lost cause despite her brains. From the little I know about my mother’s background, she had been left to her own devices from day one and by the time she hit fourteen she was pretty much doing her own thing. It’s surprising that she ever made it to university at all but, like I said, she was bright. I suppose, in the end, background ended up winning the war over brains. To cut a long story short, William was transferred to Australia shortly after I was born, shortly after my mother decided to get me christened. Maybe she had a premonition that her lousy parenting would require someone to one day step up to the plate. Who knows? At any rate, she overdosed when I was still young and I was put into foster care. And there I remained for over two years until, through sheer good fortune, William found out about me and rescued me.’
‘I’m sorry, Curtis.’ Jess hesitated, so tempted to delve deeper yet knowing he would shut down if she did. ‘You want your own child to have what you feel you never had yourself.’
‘It trumps everything.’
‘He or she can have that without us getting married. As you’ve said, we’re friends. Not enemies.’
‘Which is what makes marriage all the more appealing. No delusions. Solid grounding in a mutual desire to do what’s best for the child.’
Jess realised with consternation that that was the very reason why she couldn’t marry him. Where, for Curtis, friendship would be the glue between them, creating harmony in the joint desire to do what might be best for a child that hadn’t asked to be conceived, for herfriendship where she craved love would be a daily torment. It would be a constant reminder that she wanted more from him and, more dangerously, because she knew herself, a constant battle against hope.
‘I can’t marry you, Curtis. We have to find another way forward and I hope that way won’t involve you trying to fight me for custody of our child.’
