Page 141 of Devils' Day Party
“Are you okay?” she asks, and I have to bite back a scream. It isn't fair that when I tried to help, I just managed to make things so much worse. Pearl didn't kill herself last night, but I saw two people I care about die. I saw Raz shot. I saw Luke's heart breaking as she held April's dying body.
“Leave me alone,” I snap, knowing it isn't fair to the old lady, and putting my forehead down against Calix's chest. He's holding me in the hotel room at the Crescent, I tell myself, eyes squeezed shut. My mind is entirely blown when his left hand comes down to rest on the back of my head.
“She's fine,” he tells the woman, his voice much less caustic than normal. “I'll take care of her.”
“Should I call the police?” she inquires, taking another step forward. I suppose I should be grateful to her for picking up on the subtle signals between me and Calix. But today, I just can't. Minutes ago, one of my classmates killed two others, and I'm struggling to wrap my mind around why. I've never needed that mental health day more than I do right now.
“That won't be necessary,” Calix says, and I nearly collapse. Hearing the script today is pretty much the last thing that I want. My actions, no matter how small they seem, are capable of blowing this script to high hell, of ruining lives. “We're friends; she just had an accident.”
My head snaps up to his, but he isn't looking at me. Those ebony eyes are on the front on the convenience store, watching for Raz and Barron.
The woman retreats, but her eyes don't leave us.
“Why did you leave me last year?” I ask, tears still rolling down my cheeks as I picture the blood blooming on Calix's bare chest. He looks back down at me, his lush, full mouth twisted into a frown. “Why did you lie?”
“I'm a coward,” he says, and it's the first real answer I've ever gotten out of him, on any of these days. I want to believe—no, I need to believe—that he remembers at least something out of the past month. I wasn't there all alone. Maybe I'm the only one who remembers it the way I do, but there are fragments of those days inside of everyone I know. Barron draws me; April mentioned the ‘sex act’; my mothers made ‘ants on a log’ as a snack. Calix said friends, not classmates. Friends. “I panicked,” he continues, and there's something strange in his voice. I wonder if he's still feeling the fear and pain from last night. “Once I'd turned on you, what was the point? You were never going to forgive me.”
Calix releases me as Raz and Barron step out of the store, carrying their bags of snacks, as usual. I'm just waiting for Raz to call me Trailer Park and break my heart all over again. I turn back to Calix.
“How would you know that if you never tried?” I ask, dropping my arms to my sides. He looks back at me, a sad, distant expression in his face. Despite his good looks, his group of asshole friends, his money … Calix Knight is decidedly unhappy. Only, he wasn't that night, when he was with me. He smiled then, for real. Not a smirk or a sneer, but a true smile. “I forgive you, Calix, and I still love you.”
“What the fuck happened here?” Raz asks, but this time, he doesn't circle the cars. He just stands there with Barron at his side. He also doesn't say what he's said a half-dozen times before. “Little trailer trash bitch thought she’d get the first Devils’ Day trick on us, huh?” Those words never leave his mouth, not today. Maybe he, too, remembers being shot.
“Calix and I love each other,” I say, taking a step back toward my car. Calix watches me with dark eyes, but he doesn't say anything, one way or the other. I glance back at Raz and Barron. The former is gritting his teeth, his jaw tight, hand clenched around the handle of the plastic grocery bag. Barron studies me with his usual intensity, sucking on the red lollipop in his hand, blue and brown eyes focused on my face. “Barron draws me; Raz is jealous. I love you both, too.” I slide into the car and slam the door, turning the key three times to start the damn thing, tears still running down my face.
Raz slams his fist against the window.
“What the actual fuck, Karma!” he shouts as I pause briefly to roll the window down, but just a crack. Today is not the day where I try to balance all three boys and their affections.
“What do you know about Erina Cheney?” I ask, and Raz just gapes at me like I've lost the damn plot.
