Page 76 of Plaidypus
The kelpie tossed his head and whinnied, and the cindercorns joined in.
“Malcolm,” Kanika complained.
“He’s a kelpie stallion,” Darlene said, getting up to crouch beside her adopted daughter and offering her a hug. “Nothing gets the stallions more excited than little babies around. When you’re ready, you can run away from home for a few months until you’re ready to tell your father, all the while making him freak out because how dare his precious little darling of a cupcake go off and do things on her own. Then you get to show up bursting at the seams and watch his complete and total meltdown. It’ll be spectacular. Then you’ll have a ridiculous number of angels, archangels, and your father insisting on checking in on the baby every hour, but at least you won’t have to worry about complications.”
Malcolm stomped his hoof, bobbed his head, and kept on whinnying.
“See? Malcolm loves the idea.”
Lucifer pouted, and he even went as far as faking a sniffle. “I have a most ruthless wife.”
“Ah, but I’m the best wife in the universe. Don’t even try to deny it, Mr. Lord of Lies.”
Ernesto grinned at me. “If you wanted to know what life in his many hells is like, this is a good representation. It’s like a television show, but it’s far more entertaining.”
That I could believe. “Well, I can say his hells aren’t at all like I expected.”
“It’s only a place of terror for those deserving to be there, and justice is always served fairly. If anything,thatis the most important of the universal laws. No soul goes into his tender keeping without deserving to be there, and all souls receive fair judgement and rehabilitation, no matter what. That, to me, is the most important of the absolute truths. Justice has a name, and it is Lucifer.”
That, too, I could believe. “He’s nothing like I expected.”
“Justice never is, not when it’s done right. And neither is mercy. Some food for thought for your afternoon.”
TWENTY-ONE
You want the vampires to form triads?
The instant the last of the paint had been removed from Uluru, Ernesto began some ritual, drawing in the dry ground and crushing the leaves of several plants while whispering in some language I’d never heard before. His daughter joined in, making gestures over her father’s work.
“Catch Pierina,” Lucifer whispered into my ear. “Once they are done, their souls will swap, and it will be finished. It has already begun.”
I saw nothing different about either vampire, but I tensed, waiting for the moment I needed to catch Ernesto’s daughter. Even if she fell, I doubted much would happen to her. She sat on the ground.
“Her soul finds comfort in touch, as does his, and it’s better this way. She wouldn’t be hurt, but she will be slightly groggy for a while.” Lucifer patted my shoulder, and he stood behind Ernesto, peering down at the vampire’s work.
Neither father nor daughter paid the Devil any heed.
I had no idea what the words they spoke or gestures they made meant, although I admired their dedication to the ritual. It took longer than expected, but once finished, both vampires rose, clapped their hands together, and bowed to the rock the asshole had desecrated. Then, like puppets with their strings cut, they collapsed. I yelped but managed to catch Pierina under her arms, lowering her to the ground.
The Devil, much to his wife’s amusement, scooped up Ernesto and carried him like he was a fainted princess rather than an ancient vampire to be respected or feared.
“Maybe you should have caught her,” I said, kneeling beside the unconscious vampire. Mindful of his words about her soul requiring comfort, I sat back, hauled her onto my lap, and rested her head against my chest. Realizing the slightly awkward and intimate position I’d put myself in, I added, “Then again, maybe not.”
“What’s going on?” Leonard asked, and he knelt beside me, reaching over to check Pierina’s pulse.
The motion puzzled me, as I’d learned the hard way Matthieu no longer did normal things, like breathe, unless he made an effort to. “Do vampireshavepulses?”
The wolf chuckled. “They do, especially if they’re in a state of trauma. It’s typically a slow and steady pulse to make the blood they have keep flowing, but magic is what sustains them. I check expecting five to ten beats per minute, faster if they’re in distress. They get rather dusty between feedings, especially if they’re restrictive on their diet. Their brood is pretty restrictive and only takes what they need. She’s normal as far as I can tell.”
Lucifer carried Ernesto over to his wife, who worked at setting up a pair of large umbrellas and lounge chairs. With a little encouragement, Icy settled between the two on a thick nest of blankets the succubus set out for her. “They have become like young Matthieu, in possession of their own souls. The process wasn’t stressful on them, but their souls need time to settle back into their appropriate bodies. I expect the rest of the Saven brood is suffering similar ailments or will as soon as the souls are within range to swap. This is what I came for. I already warned my demons to care for the vampires in their brood, so all should be well enough.”
Both cindercorns snorted, and Bailey squealed and bucked while Sam flattened his ears. While the mare continued her antics, Sam asked, “And they will be all right?”
“They will be burdened with all those pesky emotions they thought gone for so many years, but they’ll be fine. You will find the Saven brood will still be the crime lords you know and love, but they will do even better at bringing ruin to the nastier elements of the criminal underworld. It will also cause certain issues, as the repossession of their souls will awaken certain protective instincts. You’ll see. I already work to preserve their brood while they adapt. This will spread. I expect the Saven brood will begin forming triads with their demons—the kind meant to reproduce rather than simply feed. How tragic. So many of my demons and devils, ensnared in the clutches of vampires. Whatever shall I do?”
Sam snorted fire at the Devil. “You want the vampires to form triads?”
“Without a succubus or incubus, vampires will struggle to plant seeds, and the ladies, such as Pierina, will need to undergo care before they can produce fruit. But it can be done, if the will is strong enough and the triad takes care. They might even be able to manage without a triad, but a triad will make it easier. In this case, it will always be between a vampire, some other species, and a demon. It will be a long time before any angel considers forming a bond with a vampire. That isn’t to say it won’t happen. If it does, it will inevitably be with a vampire from the Saven brood.”
