Page 18 of Plaidypus
“We have talked about this before. It was uncomfortable, especially when you confessed you admire other women’s breasts.”
“Well, they are pretty. Why shouldn’t I admire them?”
“Just don’t share when you’re admiring them with me. It gets uncomfortable, especially if I happen to be admiring the same woman.”
“I’m not going to ask her out on a date. I’m not into other women. Hell, apparently, I’m only interested in men who happen to also be beasts.”
“In bed or out?”
I giggled. “Both. And as you don’t like even thinking about my breasts, get out of here, soIcan get out of here sometime tonight. I’ve killed the hot water heater. It’s as dead as our moose.”
“Yeah, about her.”
“Something better not have happened to my moose.”
“She’s asleep in front of the door. I didn’t know zombie moose slept, but if you want to leave, you’ll have to step over her. She charges cuddles.”
“We’re keeping the moose,” I announced. “We need to name her. I will listen to your selection of names, and we will vote on them in the morning.”
“Leonard said she’d be transported to somewhere safe, Nadine. We can’t keep her. She’d probably melt in New York, anyway. She’ll be happier here.”
I scowled. “But I like her.”
“You were terrified of her yesterday.”
“I changed my mind.”
“You pet her once. Next, you’re going to tell me you want to bring her into the house.”
“I don’t think we can get away with bringing her into the house. She’d probably melt and rot everywhere, and that wouldn’t be good.” I splashed and slapped bubbles around while waiting for my brother to finish brushing his teeth. “What do you think of Leonard?”
“Dad would like him, Mom would give him a hard time and make him prove he’s good enough for you, and he understands the importance of hot chocolate. He helped organize the kitchen to minimize the effort it would take for you to make more hot chocolate. He is even going to account for your hot chocolate stash when we head to the United States. Which leads me to the real reason I invaded on you.”
“I was wondering about that. You usually wait until I’m done in the tub. All right. What do you want? You obviously don’t want me to flee from the conversation, as you know I will not leave my bubbly throne until you get the hell out of here.”
“I wanted to talk to you about the video and the crowdfund.”
“Is that all? Did you actually get something off that video? It hasn’t been that long since you released it into the wilds.”
“It went viral, and it got shown on the news.”
My eyes widened. “Eh? Repeat that?”
My brother brushed his teeth, rinsed his mouth, and cleaned his brush before turning to face me. “The video went viral and got put on the news. Leonard told me he’d gotten a text about it from his boss, so I went to check.”
“How utterly embarrassing.” I groaned and bowed my head. “Can lycanthropes drown?”
“You’d shift. Your platypus would take over and have fun in the tub until you came back to your senses, as we learned the last time you tried to submerge longer than acceptable in the tub, being melodramatic because Fred broke your heart for the fourth time in a week.”
I scowled at the reminder of a particularly nasty high school ex-boyfriend. “He didn’t make it to home base, just for the record.”
“Did he even make it to first base? You were always so busy breaking up with him. Did you two actually have any time to find some closet or abandoned hallway?”
Damn. My brother was out for my blood, and not the red variety flowing in my veins. “Well, no, but that is not the point. Is there enough money for us to make the trip to our parents’ place? The CDC offering to help is nice and all, but I don’t want to owe them.”
“If you can tolerate Leonard’s presence for five days, we will go to Toronto, where we will pick up the internet’s gift to you.”
“Pardon? The internet’s what to me?”
