Page 59 of Plaidypus
“There’s a reason I prefer the name silver ghost.” Lucifer narrowed his eyes. “Yes, you have indeed hooked a silver ghost. Now, can you land it?”
“Is that doubt I hear in your voice?” I growled at him.
“Quite possibly. It’s a rather large specimen, and you’re such a dainty little lady.”
The Devil would perish for calling me dainty and assuming I couldn’t land the fish.
“She’s going to kill you,” Darlene predicted.
“She’s certainly going to try,” Lucifer replied in an amused tone. “I do love when my minions try to murder me. Will I get lucky this time? Will she try to murder me in my sleep? Or through more overt means? What will she do?”
As playing the Devil’s game might lose me my fish, I focused on what was important: finding out what the hell kind of fish was a silver ghost and why Lucifer wanted some for his conservatory.
After a fifty-three minute battle,I possessed a better understanding of why Lucifer considered me a dainty little lady and questioned if I could bring in such a large fish. At the end of the human-vs-fish battle, I locked my reel and backed up, dragging my finned foe onto the shore.
At first estimate, it had at least a foot on me.
“You weren’t kidding about it being a rather large specimen,” Darlene said, staring at my catch.
I couldn’t tell which one of us was more tired: me or my fish.
“I will just relocate this to our home along with some of this water in that brand-new tank I happened to install last night.”
“Tank?” Darlene frowned. “What new tank?”
“The one that replaced the wall in your third office.”
“You didwhatto my third office?”
“I made a silver ghost habitat, and to do so, I had to take out a wall. I am not sorry.” Lucifer disappeared, as did my fish, leaving me with a bare hook.
“That cretin!” Darlene sighed, reached over, and snagged her latest iced coffee. “Nice catch. Lucifer will come back with a record of its size and weight for you along with its gender.”
“He stole my fish!”
“He does things like that. Once, he stolemyfish, as he wanted to make sure Ruby had a better house. I woke up, went to my office one morning, and my fish was gone. Fishnapped! I had a fit. Every damned demon and devil in the place knew what was going on, so they had a good laugh at my expense. Lucifer just likes when I’m riled up. Ruby was fine and got a better house, so I forgave Lucy for that incident.”
“You have a fish named Ruby?”
“He’s a betta, and Lucifer got him after I stormed the place. Mortal animals tend to fear him for a while, but Ruby wanted to pick a fight. Lucifer fell in love immediately. However much I love Ruby, he’s really Lucifer’s fish. Just don’t tell anyone I admitted that. They fight every morning, and it’s a ritual they both love. But Ruby is my fish, technically. Lucifer gave him to me as a present. If you want a fish or two, we do a breeding every year or so. I’m happy to let you pick a fry. There’s a rule, though. If we have any culls, we’re supposed to put them in one of the tanks as food. The culls won’t live long or happy lives, so it’s the best way to let them go. We just let nature sort it out.”
“Supposed means you don’t always,” I accused.
“I might have a few bowls with culls I couldn’t toss in another tank. I made the mistake of looking them in the eyes. Never look the culls in the eyes. Honestly, Lucifer takes care of it before I can get attached, and if he doesn’t act fast enough, well, I get a new cull bowl.”
“What is wrong with these culls?”
“Usually swim bladder problems or malformed fins. I have one named Garnet right now who has both deformities. She’s a good sport, but she can’t get to the surface of her tank very well. I came up with a good solution. She has step pyramids all in her bowl to let her get to the top or go to the bottom at her whim. Garnet is three years old now, and she’s at the end of her lifespan.”
Lucifer reappeared without my fish, and he raised a brow at his wife. “I left for all of three minutes, and you’re already going on about Ruby and his many sons and daughters?”
“I was just warning her we have to actually cull the ones who can’t have a good life. And you have to admit, Garnet has had a good life!”
“Which is why Garnet didn’t disappear under mysterious circumstances,” the Devil replied.
“Fucking mysterious circumstances,” the succubus complained, and she wrinkled her nose. “Will the silver ghost be okay? It had a pretty long fight with Nadine.”
“She’ll be fine, and she’ll be a good spawner this year. I’ve already done a read of her to see what she prefers for spawning, so I just need to catch her a handsome male. I already gave directions for their conservation area. Nadine, go catch me another silver ghost, and get me a good male.”
