Page 11 of Plaidypus
“Which precinct?”
I wondered, too. “How would I know? He works in Manhattan somewhere.”
“Then he’s working under the Chief Quinns in some capacity, and that’s easy enough to investigate if needed. So, about your brother.”
“What about him?”
“He was reported at the scene of the crash, which is where the hotspot is. You both need to be tested and registered for any new abilities, and if the situation warrants it, training.”
Matthieu chuckled, leaned back, and waved at the lycanthrope haunting our door. “Please identify what sort of predator she is for me, eh? At the rate she’s going through her stash of hot chocolate, you might need to register her as—”
“Matthieu!”
“Hello, Mr. Lavigne. Your sister is a wolf of some sort, although I’d have to do a blood test to identify the specific species. Her virus is robust enough the wolf scent markers are present. Really, Miss Lavigne, I’m representing the CDC. That’s not a euphemism for mass murderer or kidnapper.”
“You havethreevampire women with you,” I pointed out. “That sounds like a sufficient force to kidnap just about anyone. And well, they’re vampires. I’m sure they’re quite talented at murder, should they need to do such a thing. Preferably not at my house.”
He glanced over at his shoulder to consider his companions, who petted the moose while chatting. “The Carlton sisters have come up from Chicago at the request of the CDC, and they help new vampires adjust to their life. As we got a call about spontaneously turning vampires, they were sent. We had not been expecting vampiric foxes. Some of my colleagues have captured a few of them, and like your moose, they will be taken to somewhere safe for them and provided for. It isn’t their fault they came within range of an active hotspot, and the CDC tries to do no harm whenever possible.”
“They were sent to do what? Seduce the entire neighborhood?” I blurted.
If the vampires heard me, they paid me no attention.
Leonard snickered. “Young vampires tend to have rather healthy instincts for hunting, and that generally means appealing to potential victims and being attracted to those of the opposite gender. We’ve found they’re quite good at taming and training fledgling vampires, with a little help from their incubus partner.”
Wait. The three women had a lycanthropeandan incubus? No wonder I kept striking out on my love life. Women like the Carlton sisters existed, siphoning away all of the available luck while luring men to their bed to get a snack. I sighed and stared at my brother.
“I’m not sure I want to try to take on three sisters and their incubus at the same time, Nadine. Honestly, that whole idea makes me think we should run to the car and get to New York to crash on our parents’ couch. Maybe three sisters is the fantasy of some men, but I have exactly one penis, and there’s zero chance I can concentrate on keeping three womenandan incubus occupied at the same time. Honestly, I’d rather try handling one woman at a time.” My brother narrowed his eyes. “Why are you looking at me like that?”
I should have known better than to broach the subject of my brother’s prowess. “It’s the stare of heartbreak, Matthieu. They have an incubus and a lycanthrope, and I couldn’t even get a hookup at a dive of a bar near closing time. There is not enough hot chocolate on this planet to deal with this.” I retrieved my mug, knocked back the rest of my hot chocolate, and headed for the kitchen. “Please deal with the plaid-wearing heartbreaker while I make more cocoa. And I refuse to share. I’m almost out, and I need this chocolate.”
“I’m really sorry about her, Mr. Andretti. Come in, and if your friends would like to come in as well, they can. My sister is protective, as I’m the basement-dwelling gamer type and she’s a shapeshifter. Shapeshifters are weird ones. I take more after my mother, where Nadine is a lot like Dad, although she didn’t turn out to be a Shetland pony.”
“Yes, it says in her file she’s the only platypus shapeshifter in the Americas, which makes her unique. Until her, there were only limited platypus shapeshifter colonies in Australia, New Zealand, and the Philippines.” Leonard stepped into the house, and at his invitation, the vampire sisters came to join him.
I wished my brother luck. If they figured out he was the new resident vampire, I doubted he’d survive through whatever three women and an incubus would do to him. Then, because he was my brother, I’d get killed off by three vampires and their incubus trying to defend him.
I retreated into the kitchen, filled the kettle, and put it on the stove, mourning how young lives would come to a brutal end. Would the vampires, a lycanthrope, and an incubus get us first, or would the townsfolk figure out there wasn’t something quite right about us anymore? The zombie moose should have been a big clue something had gone more than a little wrong during the crash.
Matthieu followed me into the kitchen. “They’re not going to bite unless we ask them to, Nadine.”
His statement captured the attention of my virus, and my traitor platypus followed the virus’s lead. “I need this hot chocolate, Matthieu.”
“I’m just saying, the CDC doesn’t send people out like this to indulge in murders. Usually.”
“It’s the usually I’m worried about.”
“Just trust me.”
When my brother asked me to trust him, it meant one thing: he’d already done something implying I shouldn’t trust him. From the day he’d been born, appearing to be an innocent little infant, he’d gotten away with murder, often doing so with ruthless adorableness. As he’d gotten older, little had changed.
My little brother was a devil—possibly the Devil in disguise. If he wasn’t a devil or the Devil, he was some other terrible fiend of some sort. As I hadn’t been born yesterday, I took my time considering what he might have done to earn my wrath.
One possibility crossed my mind, and it involved the three vampire women in our living room.
I narrowed my eyes and turned to face my brother. I put my hands on my hips. “Matthieu? Did you contact the CDC about there being vampires in town?”
“Why would I do that?” he asked without hesitation, which warned me he’d preplanned his answer and had been prepared to be questioned.
