Page 48 of The Secret
His eyebrows shoot up his forehead. “Find someone?”
“You’re quite the tech wizard, I understand,” I say.
He hums. “Kate mentioned some guy who you met in Africa that disappeared. I’m really sorry that happened to you, Liss.”
“S’okay.” And I take him through the whole story. My time with Dan, my search in Zimbabwe, what Boni and I did together, and where we got to. His eyes take on a faraway look.
“You know people don’t just disappear like that,” he says.
“That’s what Kate said.”
He nods. “Because it’s true. Nowadays everyone leaves a footprint: They use computers, they use phones, they’re on social media, they get tagged in social media. And if you don’t have a footprint …” He pauses and picks up his spoon. “It takes a lot not to have something out there, if you understand what I’m saying. So it’s always premeditated. Always. Once it’s there, someone can find it, even if you’ve tried to get rid of it.”
Fuck. I mean, I knew the stuff with Dan was weird, but hearing it confirmed like this from someone who probably knows more than anyone about this kind of stuff makes a large boulder turn over in my stomach.
“Was he white?”
“Yes.” I pull up a picture of him on my phone. “Why?”
“It’ll influence where I go looking for information. I’m happy to do some digging—try and match his photograph maybe. Hack into a few places. See if I can find anything useful.”
“You think he was hiding something?”
“Oh, there’s no question.” My God, he’s so certain. “Send me everything you’ve got, and I’ll take a look.”
I should be mad at Dan, but I somehow can’t be. He took my heart, and until I find him, I can’t get it back.
He squeezes my hand. “I’ll see what I can do.”
I nod and gather up my stuff, lean over, and kiss his cheek. It’s rough under my lips. “I’ve got to go and do a lecture now, but thanks for meeting with me and thanks for this.” I squeeze his shoulder as I get up to go. It’s rock-hard under my hand. “I owe you.”
“No, you don’t. It’s my pleasure.”
I narrow my eyes at him as I hitch my backpack over my shoulder, then I lean in to whisper, “Make her life amazing,” I say, and his eyes widen at me.
Make it what mine should have been.
22
LISS
Thursday, October 17, 2019
The bus lurches down 2nd Avenue, and I shuffle robotically toward the doors. The last month has been round after round of wake up, teach, come home, watch mindless television, collapse. I can’t let any feeling close to the surface for fear the whole dam will burst. Fabian’s keeping me abreast of how he’s doing, but it’s been slow progress—apparently something to do with ancient African computer systems.
As I step out onto the sidewalk, I think longingly of my Netflix subscription and theCSIepisodes downloaded on my laptop. I’ve got years of missed episodes. Kate and Jo insisted on dragging me to a bar tonight, forcing me to ditch my lounge pants. I’d be happy with a life spent addicted to dubious TV shows.
When I arrive, Kate and Jo are sitting at the bar in silky dresses and full makeup. Jo’s dress is covered in lace. I glance down at my ripped jeans and casual jacket.At least I showered. In the past, I would have been tricked out too, anticipating a night of flirting and a fun guy to spend the evening with. But as my eyes meet Jo’s, her forehead creases. Shit. I’m nowthatfriend, the one adding to the list of worries. And Jo has a business to run, and Kate has a daily menu of life-and-death decisions.
“Thanks for persuading me out,” I mumble, and Kate rolls her eyes. I bitched at her last night about not wanting to do this. “Sorry. Fuck. Sorry,” I say, my hand on her arm as I hitch myself onto a bar stool. A lump starts in the back of my throat, and I swallow.
“This place is the best for cocktails, so I’m told,” Jo says, a bright smile flitting across her face as she leans over and squeezes my hand. I look down at the extremely long cocktail menu. “The tab is on Janus, so we don’t have to worry about how much we drink,” she adds.
Kate turns to her, mouth falling open. “We can’t do that.”
Jo’s face grows rebellious. “Look, my company’s doing okay now, and he wants to give us this, so yes we can.”
“Can I get you ladies anything?” the barman says, appearing like a genie and spinning three mats onto the bar in front of us.
