Page 51 of The Longest Speed Date

I lowered my phone. This date was wrong. Of course it was. I was the biggest idiot in Australia.

I pivoted to leave.

Hugo had sent some interesting messages as I’d driven to meet him here. Cheesy lines about going back to his dorm for a good time and had added not one but two dick pics to ensure he was absolutely clear about what he was hoping would come later.

Why had I even told Jet I was going on a date when I had no intention of doing it whatsoever? Why had I acted on my impulsive rage? I prickled and itched all over like I didn’t fit in my own skin. What the hell was wrong with me?

I staggered away from the grass edge, my stomach rolling, and barrelled into a man.

He caught me by the elbow. “Ari?”

I blinked, glancing up.

“Hey, thought it was you.” He looked me up and down and grinned. “Hugo. From online.”

“Oh. Sorry, this was a mistake.”

“Excuse me?”

“I’m going. Sorry. I didn’t mean to do this.”

I pushed past him, and then Hugo shouted after me. “Fucking cock tease.”

Ignoring the looks from some of the seated guests, I quickly made my way to Bessie, climbed in and shut the door with the windows up despite the stifling heat.

Who was I kidding? It was an oven.

I turned over the engine and drove off with a squeal of tyres, mildly satisfied that Hugo was being escorted out of the mobile bar serving area by two waitstaff.

I drove to the other side of Broome and parked with a waterfront view of Dampier Creek, got out and strolled along the jetty path, and then messaged Ash.

Me: Tried to go on a date

Me: Didn’t work out

Me: Don’t even know why I tried. Feel incredibly stupid, sick, embarrassed

Me: are you up?

Ash: Greetings from the land of fire. Seriously bushfires suck. I just puked from morning sickness so you have me alone for at least ten minutes while I’m on a break at work.

Ash: why are you panicking over a date?

Ash: Wait, are you in trouble?

My phone rang.

“Hey, Ash. I’m okay. I’m safe.” I sighed. “Although he was a complete douchebag.”

“What’s going on?”

“I was talking to Jet. Okay, it was a fight. An argument. And I said I was going on a date, even though I wasn’t, but then I got on an app and matched with someone here in Broome and agreed to meet him out of spite.”

“There’s a lot to unpack there,” Ash said carefully. “Why would you do that?”

“Jet said he loved me.”

Ash sighed. “The stupidity is rapidly escalating in this story.”