Page 174 of When She Falls (The Fallen)
Something tells me Gemma won’t be too attached to the idea of staying in New York. It’s a place filled with bad memories.
I want to take her back home with me to Italy.
I want to marry her under the lemon tree in my parent’s backyard at sunset and then take her to the house I bought in Casale when Dem became the don. It’s an old building that needs to be restored, but we’d make it into a home. I’ll build her that art studio.
I rake my fingers through my hair. Fuck, I’m getting ahead of myself.
When Gemma left me in Crete, I was so damn angry I couldn’t even process her reasons for doing it. But the flight to New York gave me a lot of time to cool down and reflect on things.
She says she left because she didn’t want me to sacrifice everything for her, but I wasn’t the only one making sacrifices.
She loves her sisters. And what did I do? I asked her to abandon them for me. That’s what spending years in hiding would have meant. I didn’t even try to find a way to bring them back into her life. I was just so wrapped up in being with her in Crete.
I won’t make that same mistake again.
Gemma deserves to have the people she loves in her life. And it’s my job to make that happen.
I’ll start with Vale. There’s no reason why they should be apart, especially given how tense things are between Gemma and the rest of her family at the moment. Gemma needs Vale’s support, especially now that she’s pregnant.
And I… Well, I need Dem.
He’s been by my side through a lot of difficult things, and he knows me better than anyone. The thought of becoming a father without him as my friend? It fucking hurts.
My emotions were running high when I told him I wasn’t leaving Gemma, and while I know I did what I had to, I’ve made zero effort to reconcile since.
It’s time I stop being a coward and have the conversation we need to have.
I release a breath and tip my head back, staring at the water-damaged ceiling.
I have to fix this.
I have to call my friend.
CHAPTER37
RAS
“You sure youdon’t want me to wait downstairs while you talk to Damiano?” Gemma asks. The two of us are sitting on the broken bed. She’s holding a cup of tea in her hands, still bundled up in my jacket from when we went outside. She woke up insisting she needed tea and reached for Orrin’s coat, but I pulled it out of her grip and gave her my own. The only man’s clothes she’s wearing from now on are mine.
I liked the sight of her in them so much I barely even felt the cold when we stepped outside. Ever since she came to me last night, there’s been a bonfire inside my chest keeping me warm.
I smile at her. “No, Peaches. I want you here.”
She leans in and presses a kiss to my cheek. “It’ll be okay. You’ll see.”
She’s more optimistic than I am. Damiano’s always been careful about who he lets into his circle, and he doesn’t trust easily. It took us practically growing up together for him to trust me. He knows as well as I do that he saved my ass by bringing me onboard when he moved to Ibiza. He’s given me a lot over the years.
Friendship. Respect. An opportunity to make more money than I’ll ever need.
And after all of that, I refused a direct order.
In some ways, the Camorra is like the army. Disobeying your don’s order is the end of your career. You’re automatically discharged, and that’s just the start of your problems.
In most cases, you end up dead.
But Dem hasn’t tried to kill me. He hasn’t even told anyone what I did, at least as far as Gemma and I can tell.
Maybe there is still hope. Can our long friendship matter more than the rules of the game we’ve been playing our entire lives?
