Not familiar with that? It’s called love, you big dumb ass.
Love? What the fuck? I wasn’t in love with Jamie. No way.
“Proceed,” I instructed the Sadists, needing to keep my head in the game.
“Based on what I’ve observed on Miss Wheeler’s list,” Mistress Cameron explained, “I’m inclined to believe she has some strong masochistic tendencies.” Her grin turned sly. “Which means she’s in for a treat tonight because that’s my specialty.”
My attention bounced between the Sadists and Jamie. While I never diverted my attention for long, I couldn’t stop myself from watching her.
“This is what is known as a violet wand, a tool sweet Maeve marked as a maybe on her limit list,” Mistress Cameron explained after she had Maeve shackled to a set of irons on the wall. Ransom stood by, taking his cues from Cameron, allowing the Mistress to run the scene. “I get the feeling she’ll be moving this particular item to an absolutely, yes once we’re done here.”
While I watched the scene set up, play out, my mind continued to drift to Jamie.
More accurately, how and when I would corner her once the evening was finished.
Jamie
“THAT WAS SO MUCH FUN!” MAEVE’S GIDDINESS was contagious, trickling through the others, making them swoon. “I’m thinking Mistress Cameron’s right. I might just be a masochist.”
“Well, I’m jealous of Jamie,” Kelly said with a wide grin.
“Me?” I stared at her. “I haven’t done anything yet.”
“No, but you get to be with Master Chaos.” There was a dreamy look in her eyes. “I can’t wait to spend time with him.”
I forced a smile, hoping it looked more genuine than it felt.
While the girls alternated between swooning over the Masters and giving a recount of what had happened during tonight’s class, I hurriedly pulled on my jeans and my sweater. I smiled when appropriate, leaving the oohing and ahhing to the others. It wasn’t that I hadn’t enjoyed watching the scenes, learning about the various tools. I had.
However, I couldn’t get past the ache in my chest, knowing Edge and Cav had tossed me to the wolves. Why I’d thought they were willing to take me as their submissive, I wasn’t sure. Even after my crying jag last night and the constant reminder that they were only doing as I asked—no special treatment—I couldn’t come to terms with the idea that I’d spend the next four weeks being passed from one Master to another while they watched.
“What was it like to have two Masters?” Yazmin inquired.
I glanced over then, curious as to Maeve’s answer.
“Different.”
“Good different? Or bad different?” Kelly asked.
Maeve’s eyes lit up. “Definitely good. I’ve never thought about having two Masters.”
I felt a knot lodge in my throat as I slipped on my shoes. I’d thought about it. In fact, I’d almost had it.
“I’ll see you guys Thursday night,” Raine said softly as she moved toward the door.
“Good night!” Maeve called out. “God, I’m not sure I’ll be able to sleep after that.”
“I’m heading out, too,” I said, not wanting to disappear without saying something. We were going to be together as a group for the next month. My goal was not to alienate the very women I would be hanging out with.
“See you Thursday,” Kelly and Maeve said at the same time.
With a tenuous smile, I grabbed my purse and headed for the door.
To my surprise, Cav was standing outside the locker room, evidently waiting for me. I didn’t stop walking, pretending I didn’t notice him.
“Jamie,” he said softly.
Or hear him.
My feet continued moving toward the stairs.
“Jamie,” he repeated firmly.
“Good night, Master Cav.” I offered a quick wave over my head.
A firm hand gripped my upper arm, halting my descent on the stairs. With no choice but to stop, I glared into that ridiculously handsome face.
“I need to go,” I said softly, the words sounding far too much like a plea.
His eyes shifted over to Edge’s office. The door was closed.
“We need to talk,” Cav stated.
“Who’s we?” I asked as Edge’s door opened and he stepped out with Jenny. His hand was on the small of her back as he guided her toward the locker room. She was smiling up at him, causing my gut to twist into a painful knot, bile racing into my throat.
Seeing him touching her like that, the same way he’d touched me the first night I was here…
I broke free from Cav’s grip and practically ran down the stairs, ignoring him when he called out to me. A sob broke free, but I managed to make it to my car without tears falling. Barely.
How could I have been so stupid?
I should’ve known this would happen. Except for our bowling date, Edge had kept me at arm’s length. I could only think this was why. He wasn’t intending for anything to happen between us because when it came down to it, I wasn’t a submissive.
