The Doms I’d played with since found me to be a challenge. They were always gung-ho in the beginning, trying to find a way to break the man who couldn’t be broken. The sad part was, they never realized I already was broken. Apparently, I was good at hiding the fact that I was shattered in a way no one could fix. The only person who’d come close was Brax.
But the Doms I ended up with were always temporary. They stuck around until they didn’t. While none of them could give me quite what Zeke could, some of them had tried. A couple had even attempted to break me. But they were all the same. The glitter always wore off and they moved on to someone else.
So, I had expected as much from Zeke, because in the end, they were all the same.
Cupping Brax’s face, I leaned in closer. “We have to respect what Zeke wants. This is his house. He invited us here and now he’s asked us to leave.”
“I don’t want to leave him,” Brax whispered. “I don’t know that I can.”
I swallowed hard because the emotion I saw in his eyes tore me up from the inside out. I knew Brax had feelings for Zeke, but thinking it and hearing it were two very different things.
“I know, babe,” I told him.
“Do you? Are you ready to wash your hands of him?”
“No.” That much was true. “But it’s not up to me.”
“I fell for him, Case.” That admission threatened to choke me. “I wasn’t supposed to, but I did.”
Not knowing what to do, I released Brax and took a step back. “You love him?”
“I don’t know.” Brax looked sincerely torn.
I should’ve seen this coming. It was all my fault. I pushed us in this direction and now Brax wanted far more than I could ever give him. It was bad enough when it was merely about the kink. Now, I felt as though I was being pushed out of his heart. That was the one place I’d always felt as though I belonged.
I nodded. “I … uh … I need…” I couldn’t finish the statement, so I simply stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel.
The water didn’t turn off and Brax didn’t come after me. He didn’t so much as call my name.
My chest constricted, a tight band coiling inside, threatening to send me to my knees. Of all the ways I saw this playing out, this certainly wasn’t one of them. Sure, I’d feared something would come between Brax and me eventually, but I never thought it would be my own darkness that would steal him away.
And that was what happened. I’d found something in Zeke that I couldn’t find anywhere else and I had pushed Brax to explore it. I’d felt things for Zeke I hadn’t wanted to feel. And yes, I’d fallen for him, too, but I knew those feelings were better left alone. He was never going to be permanent in my life.
And now it appeared Brax wasn’t going to be, either.
THIRTY-THREE
ZEKE
“YOU CAN’T TURN YOUR BACK on them, Zeke,” Jamie pleaded.
She had spent the past twenty minutes attempting to make me see reason. The only thing I saw was a kid sister sticking her nose where it didn’t belong.
“They’ve got each other,” I told her. “They don’t need me.”
Even as I said it, the words hurt.
Jamie’s eyes widened. “Is that what you think? That you’re the third wheel here?”
“It’s not what I think, Jamie. It’s what I know. They’ll find another Dom who can give them what they need. I’m done.”
My sister’s cheeks darkened and I could feel the anger inside her. I rarely saw her pissed off, but it appeared I’d pushed her to her breaking point.
Her voice lowered. “You’re an asshole, Zeke.”
“Yes, I am.” That wasn’t news to me.
“Have you talked to them at all?”
“No.” And that was the whole point. I wasn’t supposed to get close to them.
“Do you honestly not see that all three of you are the third wheel?”
That made absolutely no sense.
“That’s what happens when three people are in a relationship, Zeke. There’s no longer a couple. It’s now a triad. It’s hard enough for two people to form a bond. When there’s three … it requires more work.”
Jamie sounded oddly as though she knew from experience. I kept my eyes pinned on her. “How do you know that?”
For a moment, she broke the staring contest, her gaze dropping to her lap.
“Just trust me, Zeke. You have to put effort into any relationship.”
“See, that’s where you’re confused,” I stated hotly. “There’s not a relationship here.”
Her anger was back. “Bullshit! I’ve seen the way they look at you. And I’ve seen the way you look at them. You might want to pretend you don’t care, but you’re full of shit.”