Page 118 of Their Ruthless Sadist (Office Intrigue Duet 5)
Although I’d asked him to stay the night with me a few times, Matt had always turned me down, insisting that he liked the space we had because it made our encounters that much hotter. And he wasn’t wrong. However, I’d started to want more than just the wild, rough sex we had. We’d been together for a year and a half to the day and I was ready to move things to the next level. Tonight, over the dinner I had worked hard to make, I was going to ask Matt to move in.
“Because I have other plans,” I said simply. “Now, if you don’t mind, I’d like to eat.”
“If I don’t mind?” He sounded horrified. “Are you asking me what I want?”
After placing the full plates on the table, I turned my attention to him. “I was being polite, Matt. If you want me to insist, I can certainly do that.”
“Polite? You?”
All right. Something was up. “What does that mean?”
“You’re the Dom, right? I didn’t think I had a say.”
“Of course you have a say,” I explained. “If I led you to believe otherwise, I’m sorry.”
His eyes widened. “You’re sorry? What the hell is going on, Zeke?”
Now I was confused.
His voice rose an octave or two. “You made me dinner, you’re asking me my preference and you’re apologizing. What the fuck is wrong with you?”
“What do you mean what’s wrong with me? I thought we’d have dinner at home tonight and forego the club.”
“But that’s not how this works.”
He couldn’t have punched me harder if he’d used his fists. Why was he arguing? And what the hell was the big deal? So I wanted to stay in tonight.
I knew my confusion was written all over my face. “How what works?”
“You. Me. This. I thought you were a Sadist, Zeke? I thought you were the Dom in this relationship.”
“So, what? Because I’m a Sadist, I’m not supposed to want to have dinner with my boyfriend?”
Matt’s eyes bugged out and he took a step back. “Your boyfriend? I’m not your boyfriend. I’m your submissive, Zeke. Our relationship is Master and slave, remember?”
“So you want me to tell you to sit your fucking ass down?” I shouted. “Is that what you want from me? I can’t make you dinner or want to spend a night in with you?”
“For starters, yes. You’re supposed to command me to do things. Not ask. And you damn sure don’t apologize. What the fuck is wrong with you? Where’s the hard-core man I’ve spent the past year and a half bowing to?”
“What do you mean where is he? I’m right here.”
“And you’re cooking and apologizing. That’s not … you, Zeke. You’re the guy who flogs me because you need it. Because I need it. You don’t make me dinner and you damn sure don’t say you’re sorry. Why? Why are you acting weird?”
“Because I’m human, Matt. I don’t spend every minute of my day thinking about all the ways I want to torture you. I’m still a man, and I was looking forward to your company tonight. Without having you strip in front of a club full of people while I hit you. Is that okay?”
“No!”
He took another step back, horror glinting in his eyes. As though he couldn’t believe I would want something so normal.
“That’s not how this works, Zeke.”
“Then how does it work, Matt? Explain it to me. I’ve spent all this time falling in love with you and you’re telling me that’s not acceptable?”
If he could look more shocked, I would be surprised.
“You love me?” He said it like it was a bad word, as though he would be struck down for even thinking it.
I lowered my voice, wanting to reason with him. I wasn’t sure why he was acting like me being normal was somehow blasphemous. Sure, our relationship hadn’t been all that normal to begin with. We met at a kink club and we spent a lot of time there, but surely he didn’t think that was all this was.
“Yes, Matt. I love you.” I took a step closer, but he held up his hands.
“No, don’t. I’m… I need to go.”
Damn, my chest ached as though he’d wrapped his hand around my heart and squeezed. “Matt…?”
He held my gaze. “Obviously, this isn’t working because … you’re not who I thought you were.” He motioned toward the table. “You, me, dinner. We don’t do things like that.”
“We’ve had dinner plenty of times,” I argued.
“Sure. But only when you command me to cook. I thought you wanted that. For me to serve you.” He shook his head again. “This isn’t what I signed on for, Zeke.”
“Signed on for?”
“Yeah. You know. The contract I signed. That’s why I’m here, right? Because I’m obligated to serve you. That’s what I agreed to. Why you’re claiming you love me when I know you’re not capable of love… It doesn’t make sense.”
