Page 116 of Their Famous Dominant (Office Intrigue Duet 4)
I could hear the sincerity in his tone, and honestly, I wanted to tell him I would go with him. More so because I wanted to spend more time with him and Troy. While I’d been kneeling, I had attempted to figure out what went wrong. The only thing I was sure of what that I had failed him.
However, I was also in self-preservation mode. Probably had been since the second I saw Trent at lunch that first day. The man scared the daylights out of me. Not because I was worried he would physically hurt me. I feared I was falling for him and I would inevitably end up with my heart shattered and broken. I didn’t want to go through that. It was the reason I’d been so standoffish with the Doms I’d played with in the past. It had gotten even worse when I watched the pain my mother suffered when each of her husbands had cheated on her.
And I couldn’t forget the fact Trent had disappeared on me both times I’d spent the night with him. Waking up in an empty bed was not how I wanted to spend the rest of my life. I already did that without him in my life. Why would I settle for that?
“Do you know what went wrong tonight, Clarissa?”
There was something in his tone that had me opening my eyes. He was staring back at me, a frown on his face and real concern in his pretty blue eyes.
“No, Master.” It was true. I didn’t have a clue. I’d done everything he’d asked of me. Everything. Right down to teasing myself with a vibrator. And no, I hadn’t come. But in my defense, he hadn’t told me to.
“Do you understand what it means to top from the bottom?” he asked.
I grinned. “Of course I do. It’s when a submissive maintains control through their actions, despite what their Dominant is doing.”
“Not only do you know the meaning, you’ve also perfected it.”
That had me jerking in his arms as I sat up quickly. “I do not. I’ve never topped anyone in my life.”
His big hands curled around my biceps when I attempted to get away. He held me in place, still sitting on his lap, although now I was facing him.
“Oh, sunshine, you do. You most certainly do.”
No way. I didn’t buy that for a second. “I am a submissive,” I argued. “Always have been, always will be. I don’t want to be in control.”
“I disagree. You’re only willing to feel what you want to feel,” he continued, his tone even. He wasn’t nearly as defensive as I was. “You follow instructions ridiculously well. In a physical sense. Other than that, you might as well not even be in the room.”
I shook my head. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. Tonight wasn’t my fault. I did everything you told me to do.”
“Did you?”
“Yes,” I snapped. “I followed you around. I didn’t speak. I signed your stupid papers. I undressed Troy like you wanted. I stripped off my own clothes. I took the toy, I pressed it to my clit. I watched Troy.” I swallowed hard as emotion bubbled up in my chest. “I did everything you asked of me.”
“Except enjoy it.”
“I enjoyed it just fine,” I countered.
“Did you come?”
“No. But I would have. Eventually. If you had told me to, I would have.”
“So, you’re saying you would’ve come because I commanded it, not because you wanted to.”
“Yes. I mean no. That’s not what I’m saying.”
One eyebrow rose slowly. “The other night, when I had my mouth on your pussy, did you want to come even though I’d told you not to?”
“No, of course not.” It was only a small lie. “You told me not to come. I won’t disobey your instructions.”
“And you tried to accomplish that by disengaging, did you not?”
“No.”
“Are you sure about that?”
“Absolutely. If you tell me not to do something, I won’t do it.”
“And if I don’t specify, you won’t do it, either, right?”
“That’s my job,” I countered. “I’m only to do what you ask of me.”
His eyes darkened, this time with what I assumed was anger. “I told you to forget everything you’d learned from Shane Gibson. Did you follow my instructions?”
“That’s different,” I bit out. “As a submissive, it’s my job to please my Dom. The things Shane taught me were only to benefit a Dominant. It allows me to be a better submissive.”
“To whom? Which Dom wants a shell of a woman who’s going to do everything he wants? Only what he specifies? Tell me because I want to punch that bastard in the face.”
I inhaled sharply at the anger I heard in Trent’s tone.
He continued, “Because I don’t know a single one who wants a doll to play with, Clarissa, one who’ll pose perfectly, spread her legs when she’s asked. That’s damn sure not what I want.”
