Page 105 of Studs Up
I opened the door for him, and he bolted inside.
“Thank you,” he said. “But you have to leave.”
“Not fucking likely.” I barged in and slammed the door behind me. He backpedaled until he hit the table in his foyer.
“Nolan,” he said, trying to muster up the courage to kick me out. “Get out.”
“Okay,” I said. Crossing my arms and rooting my feet. “Right after you tell me what the fuck is going on.”
He stared at me, and I glowered back at him.
“It’s nothing,” he insisted weakly.
“It’s not fucking nothing. I saw the game. What the hell happened?”
“I don’t need you to come down here and tell me what a shit job I did tonight. News flash, I already fucking know.”
“I didn’t drive down here to tell you that,” I snarled. “I drove down because something is wrong. And I’m not fucking leaving until you tell me.”
A long moment of heavy silence stretched between us. He still shook, and all I wanted to do was wrap him up and take him away. He was scared, and I needed to know what it was. I needed to protect him.
“Come on, Holden,” I tried to soften my voice because being mad at him wouldn’t help. But it was hard when I didn’t know what the problem was.
He stared at me for a long time, his eyes getting wetter by the second, and he was on the verge of breaking down.
“I can’t,” his voice broke.
“I think you need to.”
He shook his head.
“Holden,” I said gently. “I’m not going anywhere. No matter what it is. I am not going to leave you like this.”
He continued to stare at me and shake his head slowly. Tears fell from his lashes, one by one. I wanted to wipe them away but I was afraid I’d spook him if I moved.
Finally, he slid his hand into his pocket and pulled out his phone.
The screen lit up his face, revealing how truly awful he looked. His hand shook violently as he handed me the phone.
A text, sent minutes after I texted him that morning, read:
Get rid of him, or the world is going to know you take cock like a slut.
What the fuck. They meant me. Get rid of me, or he would be outed. I looked up at him. Someone knew. My blood ran both cold and hot at the same time. His fear was so thick it clouded around him like a dense fog. This was his nightmare, all of it, all wrapped up in a nice, tidy package.
This is what kept him up at night and made him so scared.
It was the same fear I saw that night at the Rose City Inn and when I held him after he woke from his nightmares.
“Who is this?” I kept my voice even. It wasn’t Holden’s fault, but keeping the rage in check took a lot of energy.
“I don’t know.” He reached back for the table and gripped the edge.
“How long has this been going on?”
He swallowed and looked away.
Carefully, I set the phone down. It was evidence now, and throwing it wouldn’t make any of this better. I took a step closer to him, and when he didn’t flinch or turn away, I reached for him, sliding an arm around his shoulders and pulling him to me.
