Page 45 of When She Unravels
This manwantsme. If I hadn’t run, I would have lived my entire life without experiencing this once.
That realization sets off something inside of me. To my utter horror, I begin to cry. Tears trail paths down my cheeks, and I don’t want him to see them, so I break the kiss and press my nose into his chest. I want to inhale his skin, to imprint its memory somewhere deep inside my head.
But he’s not stupid. Far from it. It takes him only moments to realize something is wrong.
He places his hands on the desk and pushes himself up to put some distance between us. When he sees my face, his expression becomes perplexed. “What happened?”
“Nothing,” I say with a watery voice. “I’m okay.”
He helps me sit up. “You’re crying.”
“Unfortunately.”
“I don’t understand. Talk to me.”
God, why does he have to sound so worried? It makes me cry more.
He runs his hand over the back of his head and swears. “This is really not the reaction I was going for.” He produces a tissue from somewhere and hands it to me. “Here.”
I swipe at my drippy nose and eyes and at last manage to compose myself. “You didn’t do anything. It’s just…” I glance away. “I’m overwhelmed. You see…I haven’t had that done to me before.”
His amazement is underscored with a sharp intake of breath. “You haven’t had a man go down on you?”
I shake my head. “No.”
“I was the first.”
“Yes.”
He swipes his bottom lip with his thumb and studies me for a long moment. “You don’t have much experience with this, do you?”
Embarrassment prickles over my cheeks. “No.”
I don’t know what I expect him to do, but it sure isn’t to sigh and pull me into his chest. “I assumed things. Again.”
“It’s fine. I—” I clear my throat. “I’m ready to keep going.”
“We’re done for tonight.”
“What? I thought you had other plans.”
He rubs his cheek against my temple. “The things I said to you… What did they make you feel?”
“The dirty things?”
“Yes.”
“I liked them.”
“Did you?”
“God, yes.”
He makes a noise of satisfaction. “Good. I have so many more things I want to tell you. To do to you. But not tonight.”
He lifts me up by my thighs, making me curl my bare legs around his waist, and carries me to the enormous bed. He’s still hard, I can feel him right between my legs, but when I try to grind against him, he moves me so that I can’t reach him anymore.
My emotions are all over the place. I’m embarrassed and vulnerable. I really screwed this up, and I don’t understand why I couldn’t hold my emotions in. It’s like my mind isn’t working the way it should—the way it did before everything happened with Lazaro.
