Page 34 of Claim the Light
Do I ask for what I want? Or do I wait forhimto ask?
How do I know if our needs will align?
Hell, I know what a toxic relationship looks like, but I don’t know how a healthy one works.
I slip off my bed, taking a step toward him, my lips parting as I prepare to take a leap of faith and ask him if he’ll come with me into the shower, but he speaks first.
“I’ll take that one,” he says, standing and pointing to the middle bathroom.
“Oh.” I inhale a quick breath and pivot my thinking. “Okay.”
I turn toward the remaining bathroom, my footfalls a little wooden.
I sense him pause behind me, but when I glance back, he’s already making his way to the other room.
I tell myself we have time. I’ve committed to staying here in the veil for two weeks. There’s no need to rush into anything.
We aren’t in danger now. We’re safe. That’s what really matters.
But I can’t quite quell my insecurities.
Fuck it.I need to say what I’m thinking. Now. Or I’ll continue to second-guess myself.
I turn back, firmly pushing my hair out of my eyes, preparing to call out to him.
He’s halfway through the doorway to the other bathroom already.
“Micah.”
Just as his name leaves my lips, he stumbles, landing heavily against the doorframe. He grabs it, his knuckles turning white and his biceps flexing with the apparent effort of keeping himself upright.
I’m at his side in an instant. “Micah!”
“No,” he growls. “I’m okay. Leave me be.”
My eyes widen. “But—”
His voice softens, although he doesn’t look at me. “You deserve some comfort. A warm shower. Clean clothes. You don’t need to worry about me. I’m fine. Really.”
He pushes himself off the doorframe as if to prove his point, his back to me and his shoulders hunched.
A wash of unwanted confusion passes through me.
Is he pushing me away?
He promised he wouldn’t hurt me and I won’t forget the conviction in his entire body when he said it. He spoke with honesty and integrity. Nothing like the guile and subterfuge of Tyler’s games—the emotional push and pull that would leave me spiraling and uncertain.
Micah isn’t Tyler. If he’s telling me to leave him alone, then it can’t be because he’s trying to confuse me.
I have to believe there’s something else going on.
As he takes a heavy step away from me, I concentrate on his body language and not on what he said.
He’s moving slowly. His breathing is labored. He’s keeping his face away from me because…Fuck.
The real reason he didn’t want to lie down on the feather beds.
He’s hurt and he’s trying to hide it.
