Page 64 of Cuts like a Knife
He thought about that for awhile before responding.
“I’ll stop. I don’t mean to be. But Lex, I really like you. Sometimes I think I might be in love with you212.”
“That makes literally no sense,” I’d said.
“Okay. Sorry.”
We’d continued to lie there, side by side, in the warm damp dark, listening to the sound of our own breathing, which seemed amplified in the small space.
“This was more fun before you criticized my SpongeBob impression,” he finally whispered.
“Where’d you find that thing anyway?” I asked.
“It was here. Under the dinghy. And now I can’t even play with it. That’s on you, Lex.”
“Shut up,” I’d replied.
In the dark, time seems to slip. I had no idea how long we’d been under the dinghy. Minutes. An hour. More? It was strange. Eventually, we heard footsteps crunching softly towards us. My heart started beating fast. I don’t know why. There’s just something about hiding. Even when it’s for a game, there’s a sort of adrenaline thing that happens.
I remember I braced to be found, but nobody lifted the side of the boat. Instead, after a few moments, we heard the sound of Grey’s voice, booming out over the lake.
“Drew!” He tried again, stretching his friends name into two syllables. “Drew-ew! Game over! You win! We can’t find you! We give up! We all give up! I’m going back to the house!”
Then the sound of his footsteps moving away.
After a few moments, I started giggling.
“See,” said Drew. “Great spot.”
“Except that no one could find you and everybody got bored and gave up, which ruined the game.”
“It’s a matter of perspective. I won. That’s the main thing.”
“We won,” I said, correcting him.
“You only found me because I revealed myself,” Drew replied. “That doesn’t count.”
“I’m here, aren’t I? So I’d argue that it doesn’t matter how I found you. We’re equal winners in the game.”
“You didn’t find me,” he’d repeated. “I gave myself away.” He’d propped himself up again and was inches away from my face as we argued. “Are you sure I can’t kiss you?” He asked again.
And I don’t know why, but all of a sudden, I changed my mind.
“Oh fine,” I said. “But if you tell a soul, I’ll deny it. And then I’ll murder you, Drew Fox.”
“I’ll stop flirting,” he’d said. “I’ll save it for you.”
At the thought, my shoulders tensed a little. That wouldn’t do. No one could know. I was willing to kiss him, one time, especially because he seemed so keen on it, but no one could ever know. It was too weird. Way too weird.
“Don’t do that,” I said. “Keep flirting. Flirt with everybody. Flirt with my father if you want to. That way no one will ever find out.”
He paused for a moment, considering me. Then nodded once. “Deal,” he said, as he lowered his face to mine.
And that was our first kiss.
~
I shake my head to clear the memory and try to focus on the present moment.
