Page 31 of Lost
“Everything’s fine,” he assured her. “Just stepped inside to take a call.”
Zack saw Lysander’s eyes light up with the same hope he himself had experienced not even minutes ago. He smiled the boy’s way.
“Nothing yet,” he said apologetically, “but your friends back home convinced the cops in Columbus to start looking into that Alfonzo guy. So make sure you send them my thanks, huh?”
“Will do.” Lysander sounded almost breathless. As if the news had come as a surprise to him — a good one, judging by the way the smile remained on his face. “That’s good to hear.”
“It is,” Zack agreed. “I’ll let you kids get back to your conversation. Lunch should be ready soon, so make sure you eat something.”
Marina saluted. Zack lingered just long enough to make sure Lysander nodded before he headed back out to the party.
It was late by the time they finally made it home. Lysander was quick to yawn and wish them goodnight, and Georgia followed not long after. Zack, still buzzing from the evening’s revelries, retreated to what he liked to think of as his office.
He found Lyddle in the room, sleeping soundly on the chair Brendan had occupied only a few days earlier. He stroked the dog’s head gently as he sat down at his desk.
He woke up the computer and navigated to the band’s social media pages. He wanted to see what the fans had been saying since his last message had been posted, to see if maybe people were posting about their sightings there. It wasn’t something that he would usually do, but this message was different. He couldn’t keep his curiosity at bay.
For the most part, they were what he had expected: people congratulating him on being a father; people saying how sorry they were that this was happening; people sending their well-wishes and praying for Dakota’s safe return. But every so often, he’d come across something he didn’t expect.
The first was when he found a comment bitching at him, pointing out that he mustn’t be a great father if it took him fifteen years to realise he was one in the first place. Years of being a musician under the watchful eye of the media had helped Zack develop a thick skin, but this wasn’t a critic telling him that he was an awful guitarist — this was a fan telling him that he was a horrible father. And he couldn’t even fault their reasoning.
He had to grit his teeth and force himself to keep scrolling.
The second was when he found a comment from a girl who declared herself to be one of Dakota’s “original fans” from “before all this happened”. It went on to say that she was glad Dakota had finally been recognised byNeedless Desires. He spent little time dwelling on this comment; he had no way of knowing whether this girl was for real or just attention seeking, and it didn’t matter to him anyway. She was getting her comments and likes, and seemed happy enough for it.
He’d been about to close the browser when something caught his eye.
There was Lysander’s name, clear as day, planted right in the middle of a comment. He went back to read the entire thing —On her profile there’s a picture of her with her twin. I think it said his name was Lysander. Does that make you his father, too?— and his heart sank. Lysander had specifically asked not to be mentioned, but it hadn’t mattered. The fans, as always, had discovered him regardless.
Zack made a move to delete the comment. But what was the point? It was already several days old and the damage was done — several comments below this one confirmed it. The word was out and they were just going to have to deal with it. With a frown, he closed out of the comments and went back to the band’s profile page.
He glanced at the ceiling. His son was up there, completely oblivious to the fact that his life had just taken yet another turn. He wasn’t going to like it — of that Zack was certain, so he dreaded the thought of having to tell the boy.
Monday, he told himself. He would wait to break the news. Lysander deserved at least one more day of peace.
He typedDakota Bennettinto the search bar and brought up the girl’s profile. Not surprisingly, her profile had gained thousands of new comments within the days that Zack’s message had been up — most of them friendly, he was pleased to see. But he didn’t linger to read these. Instead, he clicked through to the photos that he’d failed to look at the last time he had been on her account.
He took his time going through them all. Dakota smiled back at him from most, sometimes on her own and sometimes with a few of her friends. At one point he came across a picture of his band, one from the days when Tommy had still been with them, back when they’d been young and invincible, and he smiled. But then he was clicking through to the next photo — the photo that had revealed his son to the world.
Me and my twin brother, Lysander.
Such a simple caption, but that was all it took.
His eyes trailed over the picture, taking in every inch of it. For the first time, he was seeing his children together. He hated that it had to be through a photograph.
They stood back-to-back as they smiled at the camera. Lysander was taller by several inches, putting Dakota at perhaps five foot four. She had the bigger smile, Zack’s dark hair, and her brother’s blue eyes. Lysander looked happier here, too. Zack hoped to see him smile like that himself, perhaps when Dakota made her re-entrance into her brother’s life. Until then, Zack would do his best.
He saved the picture to his desktop. He would print it and frame it, he decided. Maybe even stick a copy in his wallet.
He had to chuckle to himself. What was he turning into?
He shut the computer down and turned to the spacious closet where he kept his guitars and everything that went with them. From this angle, he could only see the stack of amplifiers that he had against the far wall, but he didn’t need to see the space in its entirety for it to call to him.
He retrieved his acoustic guitar from its depths.
It was the instrument he always chose when he was on his own with a little time to himself. He hadn’t touched it in weeks, since sometime before Lysander had come into his life, and for that he felt almost guilty. It should have been back in his hands the moment he’d learned he was a father. Because when something big happened in their lives, the band tended to write about it. When Tommy had passed, they’d practically worked him into an entire album. When Melody had been born, Brendan had come to them with one of the most heartfelt songs Zack had ever heard.
And here was Zack, with the biggest thing ever to have happened to him unfolding, and he hadn’t evenattemptedto write about it.
