Page 38 of Finding Us
“I’m okay.”
“You sure?”
“Yes.”
Nevertheless, I give her a moment before I draw back to the tip and slowly push back in. We both moan in unison. My brain is telling me to go faster, or maybe that’s my dick talking, but I keep a leisurely pace. It’s not until she wraps her legs around my waist—linking her ankles together at the base of my spine—and starts to buck against me, that I ramp up the speed.
“Fuck.”In some ways it feels like the first time for me too, because I can’t remember it ever feeling this good. Pulling out of the kiss, I reach for her hands, lacing my fingers through hers as I manoeuvre them above her head. Leaning my forehead against hers, I clench my eyes closed as I try to get my emotions in check. “What are you doing to me, Red?” I whisper.
I look down at the washcloth in my hand and when I see a streak of blood, my stomach churns. I noticed some on the condom when I removed it as well. I know it’s normal for a woman to bleed her first time, but it does nothing to ease the guilt I’m now harbouring. There is no turning back, what’s done is done, and I can only hope going forward she doesn’t regret what we did tonight.
I toss the cloth in the sink and rest my clenched fist on top of the marble counter in my bathroom. Instead of looking at myself in the mirror, I bow my head. I’m conflicted. It’s time for her to go, but I also know once she walks out that door, I’ll never see her again.
That is where my problem lies. I can’t have her hanging around once Blake gets back, he’s scared of females, and I need to put him first because nobody else has done that in the past.
With my mind made up, I push off the counter and exit the bathroom. I find Red exactly where I left her. I’m filled with a myriad of emotions, and I hate how seeing her in my bed pleases me. I’d like to blame that voodoo pussy of hers, but I’m pretty sure it runs far deeper than that.
I’m still naked, so I stalk towards my dresser and pull out a pair of grey sweats, sliding into them. My eyes dart to the digital clock sitting on the bedside table, and I see it’s just past 1.30 am. Out of my peripheral vision, I see Red sit up.
“I guess I should get going,” she says. And those words set off a panic inside me, because the truth is I’m not ready for her to leave.
When my gaze darts to her, I notice the sheets pulled up, covering her chest. My immediate thought is to walk over there and tug it down, because I don’t want her hiding herself from me, but thankfully, I manage to rein that in. I have no right to tell her what to do.
Her eyes track down my body as I approach the bed, flickering from my abs to the outline of my dick protruding through the thin fabric of my sweats. When she nibbles on her bottom lip, I know she likes what she sees. Is she thinking about round two? Any other time, I’d be all over that—especially with her—but I saw her wince when I cleaned her up, so I know she’s sore.
I slip back under the sheets, and prop my head up by resting my elbow on my pillow. This whole situation is weird because this is usually the time I lose interest and start to withdraw. Ineverdo sleepovers, but there’s a part of me that wants her to stay. Blake won’t be home until later today. Braydon’s dad said he’d drop him off on the way home from the zoo this afternoon. That means I have the entire day to myself.
Sure, I could do some more packing, but I’d rather spend it with her. I took her virginity for crying out loud, I can’t just toss her out. We could go somewhere nice for breakfast when we wake … followed by a leisurely ride on my bike to the Blue Mountains. It’s been years since I’ve done that. That thought sets off another wave of alarm.
What’s happening to me?
Red flips back the sheets, ready to rise, but my arm darts out, snagging her around the waist. Thankfully, she doesn’t resist when I pull her closer. I’m by no means a cuddler, and the last thing I want to do is give her false hope, but she deserves more than a quick lay. Although there was nothing quick about what we did.
I wanted to give her a night to remember, but I already know I won’t be forgetting her in a hurry. She’s well and truly left her mark.
“Don’t go.”
“But you said—”
“Ignore what I said. It’s late and I’m tired, lay with me for a while.”
“Umm … okay.”
I reach for the lamp beside the bed, flicking off the light. I’m choosing to ignore how satisfied I feel when she wraps her arms around my middle, rests her head on my chest, and snuggles into my warmth. I let out a contented sigh as my eyelids drift close. I’ll worry about all these odd feelings I’m having later; for now, I’m just grateful she’s still here.
I lift my head off the pillow and place a chaste kiss on top of her head. “Night, Red.”
“Night, Wolf.”
A smile tugs at my lips.Fucking wolf.
Chapter11
Jacinta
Although it was a huge struggle to stay awake, I somehow managed it. I’ve never lain in a man’s arms before, but I couldn’t risk falling asleep and having a nightmare. I didn’t want to do anything that would taint our time together. Wolf has no idea how much he gave me tonight, and I’m not just referring to the abundance of orgasms. Our time together is something I’ll treasure forever. But alas, all good things must come to an end, and there was never a promise of tomorrow. He made that abundantly clear, but I’m okay with that. I’m not capable of more anyway.
My eyelids are getting heavier by the second, and it’s only a matter of time before I start drifting off. “Wolf,” I whisper into the darkness, but when I get no reply, I decide it’s time to make my move.
